KILL, MAIM, AND MUTILATE THE SINGER

“They can’t do anything to me. I’m dead.”

This story seems damned churlish after all that rock & roll has done for the drug trade. Our pal HCB commented in an email – “I'd get a new tour manager”

"If Mexico's drug gangs hated anything as much as cops, it was singers and reporters. Not singers in any slang sense of snitches or stool pigeons; they hated real, guitar-strumming, love-song-singing crooners. Fifteen singers were executed by drug gangs in just eighteen months, including the beautiful Zayda Pefia, the twenty-eight-year-old lead singer of Zayda y Los Culpables, who was gunned down after a concert; she survived, but the hit team tracked her to the hospital and blasted her to death [in 2007] while she was recovering from surgery. The young heartthrob Valentin Elizalde was killed [in 2006] by a barrage of bullets from an AK-47 just across the border from McAllen, Texas, and Sergio Gomez was killed [in 2007] shortly after he was nominated for a Grammy; his genitals were torched, then he was strangled to death and dumped in the street. What doomed them, as far as anyone could tell, was their fame, good looks, and talent; the singers challenged the drug lords' sense of their own importance, and so were marked for death.” – Christopher McDougall, Born to Run.

Click here for Sid

The secret word is Vicious

BUT I AM STILL AN ACTION FIGURE

THE ANTI-OBAMA INDUSTRY

Just some of the merch that was on sale -- I would imagine for a profit -- during the wingnut battle against healthcare reform in the USA. (Lifted from the J-Walk Blog)

PLUG FOR A PAL

If you happen to be in Florida, our pal Jett has show of his paintings at the St. Augustine Art Association's 2010 Spring Art & Craft Festival on April 10th & 11th at Francis Field, on West Castillo Dr., in lovely downtown St. Augustine, FL. (Click here for Jett)

DEREGULATED MANSLAUGHTER

Massey Energy Co. has been cited over and over for repeated mine safety violations in recent years, racking up hundreds of penalties at the Upper Big Branch mine, where an explosion on Monday killed at least 25 workers. In the USA, where less than 20% of miners are UMW members, energy corporations routinely factor dangerous working conditions into their cost saving calculations, figuring it’s cheaper to pay the fines than make their mines safe for the workers. Thus it is under 21st century, deregulated, union-busting, free-market capitalism, where they party like it’s 1910, and the fact that the image of George W. Bush is used in this mine-safety poster gives a slight indication of how long this murderous cynicism has been going on.

"They placed profits over safety repeatedly," said Tonya L. Hatfield, a lawyer in the coal-mining town of Gilbert, W.Va., who has sued Massey in cases over a 2006 fire at the Aracoma mine, where 12 miners were trapped and two died. In that case the company agreed to pay $2.5 million in criminal fines. The fine, when combined with $1.5 million in civil penalties, was apparently the largest ever imposed in a coal-mining death case.
"Aracoma's conduct in this case is clear and uncontroverted," said Logan Circuit Judge Roger L. Perry, as reported by two local papers. "Given the voluntary admissions of guilt, it is clear not only that Aracoma acted with deliberate intent regarding the unsafe working conditions in its coal mine, it acted with criminal intent." (Click here for more)

Click here for some second hand Merle Travis and a video

PHALLUS FEST

The Kanamara Matsuri (Festival of the Steel Phallus) happened last Sunday. It is an annual springtime Shinto fertility held in Kawasaki. Japan. The exact dates vary, but the main festivities always fall on the first Sunday in April. The penis forms the central theme of the event that is reflected everywhere – candy cocks, carved vegetables, decorations, and a mikoshi parade. The Kanamara Matsuri is centered around a local penis-venerating shrine once popular among prostitutes who wished to pray for protection against sexually transmitted diseases.

FACE DANCERS

Face-recognition technology is already intruding as CCTV and other surveillance cameras gain the capacity to ID individuals on the street and in public places. Smartphone apps may soon allow cops, government agents and even private individuals to do the same. Fortunately, for outlaws, those concerned with basic privacy, and anyone else who objects to being face-booked, some good news has arrived. Anti-recognition camouflage face paint could soon be protecting the wearer against identification. Adam Harvey, a designer and technologist with NYU's Interactive Telecommunications Program, has begun reverse-engineering algorithms behind face detection. He generated a series of blocky images that could become the "building blocks of anti-surveillance makeup," and focused on the simplest yet most important patterns for foiling the face-recognition tech. Couple this with an alt-fashion, retro-Kiss, face-paint fad, and electronic Big Brother could be seriously thwarted.

“Anti-Face-Recognition Camo Images with a red square represent those where a face was found, whereas no red square meant the face escaped detection. "TEST PATTERNS" marks patterns made according to the reverse-engineering, while "RANDOM PATTERNS" shows random doodles made without the benefit of face-detection patterns. "NO PATTERNS" simply indicates how face detection algorithms work even on basic line drawings.” Click here for more.

Click here for Billy Idol

The secret word is Mask

THE FROZDICK FAMILY

Carbon Frozdick was hard on the furniture.

CTHULHU GOES SURFING

Image supplied by Ray Cooper

IT’S THE REAL THING

Our pal Munz sent us this encouraging pay-back story from Bolivia, where – among other corporate atrocities – Bechtel have tried to steal their rainwater and sell it back to the people.

“Move over Coca-Cola: here comes Bolivia. The Andean nation’s indigenous people have long resented the U.S. beverage company for usurping the name of their sacred coca leaf. Now, they are aiming to take back their heritage. Recently, the government of Evo Morales announced that it would support a plan to produce a coca-based soft drink which would rival its fizzy American counterpart. It’s still unclear whether the new drink will be promoted by a private company, a state enterprise, or some type of joint venture between the two. The new beverage will be called Coca Colla, in reference to age old history: in Bolivia, Quechua, Aymara, and other indigenous peoples descended from the Incas are known as collas. In a move that will undoubtedly exasperate Coke, Bolivian officials say Coca Colla will feature a black swoosh and red label similar to the classic Coca-Cola insignia. Coca Colla reportedly has a black color, just like normal Coke, and could be sold on the market as early as April." (Click here for more.)

Click here for Hank III

The secret word is Refreshes

A PROPERLY APPOINTED OPIUM DEN

Now all we need is return to the Victorian values of totally traditional and properly appointed opium dens – with soft lights and full-service cabin attendants, the hall of mirrors and the tail of the dragon – and the world would be a much more attractive place. Hell, I might even retire if such was the case.

AND WE MAY NEED THE DRUGS BECAUSE, SURE AS SHIT, THE OIL’S RUNNING OUT

Our pal aeswiren writes – “Our civilization is sleep walking towards the cliff. Calm rising fears and drive home afterwards seems to be the modus operandus. In the US, major media have still not brought themselves to even consider discussion of this. And in just a few years, we will hit shortages. You can imagine what that's going to be like.”

“February 10, when the UK Industry Task Force on Peak Oil and Energy Security issued a report called "The Oil Crunch: A wake-up call for the UK economy." I only mentioned it in passing at the time, but it was a stern warning that "oil shortages, insecurity of supply and price volatility will destabilise economic, political, and social activity potentially by 2015." The British government, including energy minister Lord Hunt, responded by staging a closed-door summit meeting with the taskforce on March 22. As the UK's Guardian reported , the government intended to develop an action plan to contend with a near-term peak, and to "calm rising fears over peak oil." Veteran peak oil analyst and taskforce member Jeremy Leggett explained: "Government has gone from the BP position — '40 years of supply left, the price mechanism works, no need to worry' — to 'crikey'." According to reports from attendees, the summit yielded some important conclusions:
• Peak oil is either here, or close enough.
• Prices will have to go higher as demand outstrips supply.
• Governments will be forced to intervene to maintain critical levels of oil supply, and limit volatility.
• Rationing measures may be unavoidable.
• Electrification of transport must be pursued in order to reduce demand.
• Communities will need to work quickly to reorganize around walking instead of driving, producing food and energy locally instead of importing, and generally try to reduce their need for oil.
The next warning was a report that surfaced around March 12. Three authors from the College of Engineering and Petroleum at Kuwait University had applied advanced mathematics to reserve and production data. The model estimates the world's ultimate crude oil production at 2140 billion barrels, with 1161 billion barrels remaining to produce as of the end of 2005. It forecast that world production would peak in 2014 around 79 mbpd. The annual depletion rate of world reserves was estimated to be around 2.1%. The model indicated that non-OPEC production peaked in 2006 at 39.6 mbpd. It forecasts that OPEC production will peak in 2026 at 53 mbpd, up from 31 mbpd in 2005, with the majority of the increase coming from Iraq, Kuwait, and the United Arab Emirates. Then OPEC production is expected to decline to 29 mbpd by 2050.
On March 22, another bombshell exploded in the press as former UK chief scientist David King and researchers from Oxford University released a paper claiming that the world's oil reserves had been "exaggerated by up to a third," principally by OPEC. They anticipated that demand could outstrip supply by 2014-2015. “

UNICORN MEAT? NOT FOR SUNDAY BREAKFAST?

I think I’ll just post this without any comment at all.

"Unicorns, as we all know, frolic all over the world, pooping rainbows and marshmallows wherever they go. What you don't know is that when unicorns reach the end of their lifespan, they are drawn to County Meath, Ireland. The Sisters at Radiant Farms have dedicated their lives to nursing these elegant creatures through their final days. Taking a cue from the Kobe beef industry, they massage each unicorn's coat with Guinness daily and fatten them on a diet comprised entirely of candy corn. As the unicorn ages, its meat becomes fatty and marbled and the living bone in the horn loses density in a process much like osteoporosis. The horn's outer layer of keratin begins to develop a flavor very similar to candied almonds. Blending the crushed unicorn horn into the meat adds delightful, crispy flavor notes in each bite. We are confident you will find a world of bewilderment in every mouthful of scrumptious unicorn meat." (Click here if you really want to go further.)

Click here for Marc Bolan

The secret word is No

SUNDAY IN FRANCE WITH GENE

I was rummaging through YouTube looking for clips of Eddie Cochran when I found this little trove of live Gene Vincent from the early 1960s. This is dynamite stuff, but kinda hardcore and mildly demented, and will probably make more sense if you’ve had previous exposure to Gene and the bop that just won’t stop.

Click here for Baby Blue
Click here for Be Bop A Lula
Click here for Say Mama
Click here for Rocky Road Blues
Click here for Long Tall Sally

WHO’S DRIVING YOUR PLANE? #1

Yes, neighbours, it’s the cockpit of the flugelrad. The film Iron Sky (see Doc40 March 26th) isn’t supposedly due out for a couple of years, but the producers seem to be going into high tease. Last week we had their Moon Troopers and now we have the cockpit of the Nazi flying saucer. This may be edging into an unhealthy preoccupation, but having imagined myself through a novel based on the same folklore, this visual take is fascinating.

WHO’S DRIVING YOUR PLANE? #2

I REALLY HATE EASTER

I have never liked Easter. As a child, things always went wrong at Easter. Indeed, it’s no exaggeration to say I truly loath Easter. Of all the Christian holidays, it is the one most transparently stolen from Mithras or his like. Too obviously a purloined pagan springtime fertility fest. But I don’t want to go into any reruns of South Park or Eddie Izzard about the totally implausible incorporation into violent Christian sacrifice of marshmallow chickens, chocolate eggs, the Warrens of Golgotha, or the Bunny Who Should Be Pope.
I won’t even speculate why, when alcohol is a major built-in element of Christmas, there’s no tradition of drinking at Easter. Not even a clean Bombay martini to hail the lengthening day. Maybe the pagan’s ran out of booze by the end of February. Maybe that’s why Easter is so miserable when it should be a feast of optimism and joy that we made it through another winter. Of course, the Christians removing the sex from the fertility, and substituting fear, agony, and death didn’t help.
As an English schoolboy, I was force fed all the crap about Jesus saving us from our sins, and guaranteeing our eternal salvation by coming back from the dead after three days. Even as young as age seven, I found it all extremely and unbelievably depressing. (And there’s nothing more pathetic than a depressed seven year-old.) Easter totally convinced me of the absolute need for a separation of church and state. Every year the horrible weekend rolled around. First we had to go through the dreadful Thursday night with the weird Da Vinci meal, and then Jesus being ratted-out by various disciples like a lost sequence from Godfather II, and taken downtown by the Roman gestapo for all that Mel Gibson torture and barbed fishhook whips, while debate over jurisdiction fight ping-ponged between the Roman Gov and the Sanhedrin. To paraphrase Bob, the trial was bad enough, but the hideous execution was ten times worse.
I made the mistake quite early in life (although it was more on account of Spartacus than Jesus) of discovering that crucifixion was not a tidy matter of blood and iron nails, but horrendously slow asphyxiation, fighting for every dying breath. I was well aware why traditional vampires feared crosses. They scared the shit out of me.
And then it was Easter day. No presents, no big dinner, and, in the story, Jesus came out of the lousy cave, but even I, as a very small boy, could see that he was by no means quite right. Hell, he wasn’t even as robust as Dracula in a sequel. He kinda faded in and faded out, and I knew it was some supernatural confidence trick like ectoplasm. I guess it was the weird, fucked-up Easters of my childhood that really laid the foundation for my grown-up wish that the Rapture would move its lazy ass and get here so we can be rid of all the troublemaking born-again assholes, their spread-eagled deity, and their singular bloody piety. Let the Beltane fires burn and freedom ring. Yes, my friends, I really hate Easter.

But click here for Johnny Cash anyway.

The secret word is Disbelief

I’D RATHER SPEND THE DAY ON WILLIE’S BUS

(Image from Munz)

Click here for Gene Vincent and Eddie Cochran

THE FROZDICK FAMILY

Opalyne Frozdick had also received warning of Caligula’s plans.


(If you don’t understand this, scroll back to last Wednesday. Image by Valerie.)

SPACE OPERA

FRIDAY? WHAT’S SO GOOD ABOUT IT?

“Can we talk about this after the weekend?”

Click here for the obvious.

AN HISTORIC ARTIFACT

“At least I had the decency to stay out of politics.”

When I read the item below, I realised that, here in the Shadow World of the Tubular Internets, this video is now a milestone in virtual chicken-history.

"CHARLOTTE, NC.—AEBN has announced that it will be streaming the infamous Paris Hilton sex video for a limited six-month engagement, and that the storied video also has been encoded for RealTouch, the company's proprietary haptic male masturbation device. Hotel Heiress: The Paris Hilton Sex Video, which first hit the internet in 2004, features Hilton and then-boyfriend Rick Salomon in a bedroom romp that includes the green-tinged night vision footage most readily associated with the celebrity sex video. One of the first leaked sex tapes in the age of ubiquitous internet use, clips from the video were widely circulated across the web."

Click here for Main Title Theme (from The Man With The Golden Arm)

DON’T FUCK WITH MY SATORI – YOU WOULDN’T LIKE MY SATORI.

Click here

DRUGS AND MORE DRUGS

Only a couple of days ago the UK tabloid media were bent out of shape about the designer drug mephedrone, but now we learn from this Sky News report, forwarded by our homeboy Arsyd, time has marched on and today they are wholly hysterical about something called naphyrone that is ten times worse on the disco-party drug fantasy scale of horror. Should the mind boggle or just pour itself a drink?

“Dave Llewellyn, who admits supplying large quantities of mephedrone to customers in the UK, said the new chemical is so dangerous he was refusing to sell it on his website - although it would not be against the law. "This stuff is absolutely evil - it's going to cause all sorts of psychological problems," he told Sky News. "It will cause long-term brain damage from the very first hit and eventually it's going to end up with bodies."
Naphyrone is already being marketed as a mephedrone replacement, but according to Mr Llewellyn it is far more toxic than many illegal drugs like cocaine and ecstasy. The substance is sold online under the name NRG-1 and costs as little as 25 pence a hit. The fact it is so cheap means, according to Mr Llewellyn, that it is likely to become hugely popular with youngsters. "I think it really could be Europe's crystal meth. I can see an epidemic where people are getting into it without realising what they're getting into and then having to go back for more." For the moment naphyrone is not widely available in the UK, but its presence is a concern for many established scientists. Medical director of the charity Addaction Dr Ken Checinski has warned those considering taking the designer drug to think again. "We know a little about its chemistry. We know it's a variant of other substances both legal and illegal that can cause psychological and physical harm," he said. The Government is currently trying to outlaw mephedrone - but naphyrone is likely to escape the ban for the moment.”

Click here for very designer Floyd

The secret word is Wasteland

INCOMING!

Okay, so the Large Hadron Collider has cranked up, crossed the steams, annihilated particles, but, even though it is April Fool’s day, nothing terribly bad has happened so far. No mini-black hole has vaporized Western Europe. No Time Lords have come burning back from the future to put a stop to it all. The Vatican is still standing. And my best instinct tells me that time is moving just as it always did, although it can sometimes be hard to tell. On the other hand, the Hubble telescope is keeping an eye on a mysterious X-shaped object traveling through outer space at 11,000mph. NASA says that P/2010-A2 may be a comet, product of the collision between two asteroids, but what’s really making the Hubble’s circuits sit up and take notice – aside from the thing resembling both a Klingon Bird of Prey and one of those evil Shadow vessels from Babylon 5 – the 100 meter-wide nucleus of the weird X is outside the dust halo and separated from the trail. This something never previously seen with a comet or any other object on a natural, solar-system system flyby. Click here for close-up and more.

Click here for Husker Du

The secret word is Stardate

DHALGREN IS A PLAY?

When Samuel R. "Chip" Delaney published his novel Dahlgren, in 1975, if all but floored me. I had just started publishing book length fiction – The DNA Cowboys Trilogy to be precise, and I thought I was pretty smart. Then I read Dhalgren – with its layer upon layer of ambiguous complexity and, in addition to speculating if Delaney was the natural heir to Bill Burroughs, I wondered if I was supposed to write shit like that. Mercifully I wasn’t and we all went on with our lives. Now Dhalgren is a play. Damn.

“It seems appropriate that Dhalgren, or at least the latest mutation of it, will return this month to the city of its birth. On April 1—Delany’s 68th birthday—the Kitchen will begin staging an adaptation called Bellona, Destroyer of Cities. Its director and writer is Jay Scheib, an MIT professor and rising theater-world star who’s been obsessed with Dhalgren for years. He once devoted an MIT course to the book, and has even adapted it into a play in German. “It took me roughly a year to read Dhalgren for the first time,” Scheib says. “I would read the same ten pages over and over and over again.” The loop structure impelled him to keep coming back. “You get the feeling that the story has been going on like a fugue for millennia,” he says. “The second time you read it, it’s thrilling. The third time, it makes you high. After that it’s like reading philosophy.” The play’s producer, Tanya Selvaratnam, took the opposite approach, reading the entire book in a day and a half; by the end, she says, she felt like she was hallucinating. One of the actors told Scheib that reading the novel was the hardest thing he did all year. (Delany hasn’t read the book in probably fifteen years and has little interest in doing so; his energy is focused on “futzing” with his next novel, Through the Valley of the Nest of Spiders, due in November.)” Click here for more.

SAY HELLO TO MY LITTLE FRIEND

Click here for the school play version.

GRATUITOUS AND ANONYMOUS