SIXTY FIVE YEARS ON

Outside the roadtrip capsule, they are remembering D-Day. Not only does the destruction of Nazism pose a problem for anyone basically opposed to war, but, on a much more personal level, I have to wonder if I would have had what it took to do what these guys did?

The secret word is Beachhead

WHAT'S REAL AND WHAT IS NOT

Since I’ve never been exactly in the habit of taking vacations – I always figured, to do that, one had to be gainfully employed in the first place – I have been looking through the windshield of this mythic but quite actual Doc40 road trip with some fascination. The world seems a much calmer and more organic place away from the 24-hour news cycle and the manufactured crisis-de-jour, although this is not to say that the world of Barack Obama, Gordon Brown, and the Taliban is any the less real. It’s just that – when not caught in the immediate ebb and flow – it tends to recede and not so constantly and so petulantly demand my attention and emotional involvement. I know I will return to media perdition, but it feels so damn good to be away from it. (Pic from Valerie.)

The secret word is Relax

Koko Taylor – RIP

David Carradine -- RIP

BILLBOARDS ON THE LOST HIGHWAY

OUR WHACKY UNCLE BILL

Uncle Bill does not approve of the roadtrip and makes his attitude abundantly clear.

THE ROAD TRIP ROLLS

The Doc40 road trip rolls on, into the dust and into the distance. I know the posts have been short – if not skimpy -- but that’s the way of it when reporting from the fabled Lost Highway. Most of the characters are keeping up, although there are elements of the exercise that are akin to the proverbial herding of cats.

The secret word is Boldly

THE FROZDICK FAMILY

Cousin Claudia stayed home to take care of her Seconal collection.

CYBERPOSTCARD #3

Mekonta is breathtaking as always. The weather is lovely. My hotel is the one exploding. Wish you were here.

MARMITE JESUS?

Jesus H. Christ. When the image follows one across all cultural divides, and appears in the lid of a jar of Marmite -- the unique British salty yeast spread -- you know the guy has to have something going for him despite all the trouble he's caused. Of course, the Brits are not gathering in their hundreds to worship at the Jesus jar. Those raised in what Eddie Izzard calls "the Murdering Bastard Religion" -- only invented to let Henry VIII dump a couple of surplus wives -- can't raise those levels of emmotion. (The image came from the wonderful Valerie.)

The secret word is Soldiers

IN ALL THE DELIS IN ALL THE WORLD...

A sandwich has been named after me! I am blown away. Like I was in old school show business. My Facebook pals Mike Dolan and Tim Napalm alerted me to the above menu posted in what Mike called “little indie coffee place called Cake Shop” on Ludlow Street in New York. The really odd part is that I actually eat ham & Swiss.

The secret word is Crust

CYBERPOSTCARD #2

The bottle people of Pangea do not communicate well.

SUNDAY MORNING

In distant places, breakfast can be strange. (Or is it that in strange places, breakfast can be distant.)

CYBERPOSTCARD #1

The flight was all that might be expected and we were able to avoid the attack of the Lego facegrabber.

The secret word is Brunch

ROAD TRIP!!!

For the next couple of weeks Doc40 and the whole cast of characters will be travelling and bulletins will come from the Lost Highway.

The secret word is Outahere

AND MAYBE SEEKING THE ABSINTHE FOUNTAIN OF ETERNAL YOUTH OR MAYBE DAMNATION

Image supplied by Elizabeth

HEY TEACHER, LEAVE THOSE KIDS ALONE!

The fabulous Nickel In the Machine site currently carries an amazing story of the 1972 London school kids uprising. I recommend everyone to check it out. “We ain’t gonna take it. Never did and never will.” (Nickel In The Machine recently changed it’s URL. It’s been updated in our permalinks on the right.)

“The pupil power demonstration was called by the rebel Schools’ Action Union, of which self-confessed Marxist Ginger Finch was a member, who were mainly against caning, detention, uniforms and ‘headmaster dictatorships’. Eventually 800 pupils had joined the demonstration and Finch was arrested, charged with using insulting behaviour and obstruction. Prime Minister Edward Heath decided to take no risks, remember this was only four years after students in Paris had brought down the French Government, and ordered MI5 and Special Branch to monitor the schoolchildren revolutionaries. Mr Heath asked Margaret Thatcher, then the Education Secretary to compile a report which warned: “Some boys and girls are already beginning to develop political attitudes in an immature way…” A march of 10,000 pupils was organised by the Schools’ Action Union and the National Union of School Students for the 17th May. The Government wanted to take no chances but were struggling to find out the exact nature and route of the march. A Conservative MP called David Lane forwarded a report based on the accounts of a group of girl ’spies’ who had infiltrated a meeting.”

The secret word is Wall
The secret message is 537461792074756e65642e

THE LOCKED DOORS OF PERCEPTION

How tightly locked down are the doors of perception in this aftermath of Bush-era constriction, deception, and stupidity? Dare we hope for a spiritual awakening or is the road to ruin too well mapped in advance? Our good buddy Sigmond Twayne started the ball rolling with a video of Terence McKenna
and then I collected a few more for good measure.

Click here for “Reclaim You Mind”

Click here for "Aliens"

Click here for "UFOs"

Click here for "Cultural Operating System"

And click here for the other side of the coin and see FBI boss Mueller repeat the same tired excuses for not legalizing drugs.

THE FROZDICK FAMILY

Drusilla finally finds an occupation to which she can relate.

MEMORIAL DAY

It's more than old war movies on TV.

MEMORIAL DAY

The name of the village was Trang Bang.

MEMORIAL DAY

When will enough finally be enough?

The secret word is Redundant

THE ADVENTURES OF MARILYN (Part 4491)

In which Marilyn finds herself caught between a rock and hard place, or, to be more precise, an old-school gloved heavy and one of the million incarnations of Groucho Marx. It’s a predicament of cosmic proportions, and, in the background, a hatstand is observing. Both basic training and simple common sense have taught her never to trust a man in a cheap suit and black gloves. They never mean you any good especially if they’re holding a pistol. And yet the Groucho multiples are a danger in themselves, especially if you don’t know the secret word and can’t summon The Duck. With the Grouchos, you bet your life and there isn’t a sanity clause.

(THE ADVENTURES OF MARILYN NOW HAS IT’S OWN PAGE SO THE WHOLE THING CAN BE READ WITHOUT SCROLLING. CLICK HERE)

MEMORIAL WEEKEND SUNDAY BREAKFAST

A henge (well that’s a memorial isn’t it?) built from bacon-wrapped Twinkies. I lifted this from Adam Gorightly who may be as unwell as I am.

VOODOO NOUVEAU

Valerie sent us the following (and also the pic of Marilyn)…
“Late one night in a small Alabama cemetery, Vance Vanders had a run-in with the local witch doctor, who wafted a bottle of unpleasant-smelling liquid in front of his face, and told him he was about to die and that no one could save him.
Back home, Vanders took to his bed and began to deteriorate. Some weeks later, emaciated and near death, he was admitted to the local hospital, where doctors were unable to find a cause for his symptoms or slow his decline. Only then did his wife tell one of the doctors, Drayton Doherty, of the hex.
Doherty thought long and hard. The next morning, he called Vanders's family to his bedside. He told them that the previous night he had lured the witch doctor back to the cemetery, where he had choked him against a tree until he explained how the curse worked. The medicine man had, he said, rubbed lizard eggs into Vanders's stomach, which had hatched inside his body. One reptile remained, which was eating Vanders from the inside out.
Doherty then summoned a nurse who had, by prior arrangement, filled a large syringe with a powerful emetic. With great ceremony, he inspected the instrument and injected its contents into Vanders' arm. A few minutes later, Vanders began to gag and vomit uncontrollably. In the midst of it all, unnoticed by everyone in the room, Doherty produced his pièce de résistance - a green lizard he had stashed in his black bag. "Look what has come out of you Vance," he cried. "The voodoo curse is lifted."
Vanders did a double take, lurched backwards to the head of the bed, then drifted into a deep sleep. When he woke next day he was alert and ravenous. He quickly regained his strength and was discharged a week later.” (Click here for more.)

The secret deity is Doctor Hypodermic

SPACE OPERA

SCI-FI POLICE STATE (Part 1)

Our pal Hipspinster sent this over. I don’t know whether to be disturbed or envious.

“The line between what's real and what's not is thin and shifting, and the U.S. Department of Homeland Security has decided to explore both sides. Boldly going where few government bureaucracies have gone before, the agency is enlisting the expertise of science fiction writers. Crazy? This week down at the Reagan Building, the 2009 Homeland Security Science & Technology Stakeholders Conference has been going on. Instead of just another wonkish series of meetings and a trade show, with contractors hustling business around every corner, this felt at times more like a convention of futuristic yarn-spinners.” (Click here for more.)

In the email that brought the link, Hipspinster asked “why didn’t they call you?” My first response was “why indeed.” I sure as hell could think up a totally fiendish, fear driven, and wholly ruthless state security machine. It would be almost as much fun as a sci-fi writer inventing his or her own religion and taking over the minds of movie stars (such as they are.) But then it occurred to me that’s exactly why I wouldn’t be invited. Too gleefully overt about stuff they still like hide with euphemism. And, of course, I’d never get a security clearance. It’s a damned shame Phillip K. Dick isn’t alive to see this.

The secret word is Oprichnina

SCI-FI POLICE STATE (Part 2)

Ummm…Gore Police? Is this Renquist territory or what? Tokyo seemed okay the last time I looked.

(That’s the Tokyo Tower in the background on the left. I once played a very prestigeous rock & roll gig there.)

FELINE POLICE STATE

THUG-DREAMS (or what the fuck does Dick Cheney want?)

As the dreadful Dick Cheney travels the length and breadth of the media, justifying his unique brutality and corporate totalitarianism, he is never asked what he really wants. The general assumption – unless Cheney is trying to promote his way out of an international atrocity trial – is that he wants rewrite history to his advantage. Yet, this idea would seem to be based on that very shaky supposition that Dick Cheney needs to be liked, and we have seen scant evidence of any such need. We do know that – in addition to being America’s Dark Lord of the Sith – he is also a money grubbing oaf, laughing all the way to Halliburton’s Swiss banks, and he might attempting to guarantee himself top dollar on the neocon lecture circuit. Another option might be that making these insane speeches creates at least the illusion that he still wields power.
And illusion – more precisely delusion – may well be the ultimate key to understanding Dick. We all remember the study that revealed how conservatives are more fearful than lefties and have much worse nightmares. Even a cursory examination of Cheney’s record reveals he’s about as delusional as Eric Cartman, and massively more dangerous. We also know he’s ultimately paranoid. He’s the one with the secret bunkers, the hazmat suits, and the man-sized safe in his office. He started out as a Watergate gopher, hand reared by Richard Nixon, and grew more reptilian from there on out. Cheney is not Glenn Beck or Sean Hannity. They’re just media snakes, in it for the Murdoch bucks, spinning black helicopter/FEMA camp shtick for the rabid rubes, but not believing a word of. Cheney, however, is a true believer. He’s also been there and done it.
As rumors spread about how Cheney has a network of loyalists inside the Pentagon and the intelligence community, I begin to wonder if maybe the Cheney dream is one of actually returning to power. Brought back, not by popular demand, but by a military coupe or putsch, which – when coupled with the immortality shots – will enable him to reign forever and ever. Now I’m not saying this is actually going to happen. I’m merely speculating on what might the true nature of Dick Cheney’s dream. On the other hand, though, Dick Cheney once dreamed of having his very own war for fun and profit, and that unfortunately came to pass.

The secret word is Megalomania
The secret message is 53746f702068696d206265666f7265206865206b
696c6c7320616761696e21

"I am not delusional!"

OUR WHACKY UNCLE BILL

Uncle Bill wants to go home now, but the alien spacecraft is stuck in traffic.

WE SO TOTALLY DON’T CARE BUT…

Hipster snob that I am, I have never watched American Idol so I don’t know how all this works, but the following does strike me as a tad odd, okay?

The Arkansas News online boasts – UPDATE: Told ya so! You heard it here first. It was the Arkansas vote!!! AT&T confirms 38 million votes from Arkansas alone. There were 100 million votes total. Congratulations Kris and…

But Wikipedia tells me the population of Arkansas is only 2,855,390 (2008 est.)
Ummm…what the fuck?

CONSTRUCTIVE USES FOR BARNEY

Pausing for a moment in our observation of a planet on a fast elevator to hell, we look, for a moment, at the foolishness of cocaine dealers. The following was lifted from Snopes.com.

• In 1998 at a post office in Texas, a drug-sniffing dog detected two pounds of cocaine hidden inside a talking Barney doll which was being shipped to Waltham, Minnesota. Officers of the law followed the package to its destination, where they arrested three men on federal charges of conspiracy to possess, and intent to distribute, cocaine.
• In 2001 in Charleston, West Virginia, four members of the same family pled guilty to federal charges of conspiring to sell cocaine and two prescription painkillers that police had discovered stashed in a Barney doll.
• In 2004 in Pawtucket, Rhode Island, more than $2,000 was found inside a plush stuffed Barney doll at an apartment inhabited by a family with five children. The kids' grandmother and their mother's boyfriend were charged with possession and intent to distribute cocaine, and the youngsters were taken into the care of the state's Department of Children, Youth and Families. 13 grams of cocaine were discovered inside the stuffed animal, more than 30 grams of cocaine in a flower pot, and 5 grams of marijuana in a dresser drawer.

The secret word is Busted

GIRLS TOGETHER IN SHIRTS

This too might require explanation. (Or maybe not.)

THE HORRORS OF SOCIALISM

The lesbian fetish porn image posted above is not intended to be enjoyed by the prurient. It’s only provided as a highly accurate graphic representation of how the Raving Looney Shotgun Hillbilly Jesus Party imagines the horrors of socialism. For them it is the worst possible scenario and the repository of all evil. They also believe that the American people totally agree with them – to the point that the Republican National Committee think they can make points by issuing an edict that requires public speakers to call the Dems the “Democratic Socialist Party.”
The weird part is that the American people seem to be going in the totally opposite direction. A recent Rasmussen poll shows – quite amazingly – that “U.S. adults under 30 are approximately evenly divided on the question of socialism-versus-capitalism. According to a telephone poll by 33 per cent of the under-30’s prefer socialism, 37 percent prefer capitalism, and 30 per cent are undecided.”
Just to add to my amazement, back at the White House – supposedly the heart of Marxist darkness under the tyrannical reign of Barack Obama – our President shuns embracing even the mildest of socialist tactics despite the overwhelming evidence that only a revised from of socialism will save this country. (And I use the term “revised” advisedly.) No single payer healthcare, no end to the wars, not even partial nationalization of the banks, no WPA energizing of arts and media, no visible public works programs, and no marijuana legalization. Is this nation becoming too weird to survive?

Click here for the Rasmussen numbers.

The secret word is Starveling
The secret message is 446566696e6974656c7920746f6f207765697264
20746f20737572766976652e

THE FROZDICK FAMILY

Each morning Cousin Beowulf would play the national anthem on the Theremin to greet the day with suitable patriotism.

THEY DON'T STAGE SHOWS LIKE THIS ANY MORE #15

ENTER THE WOLFRAM

“It is Wolfram Alpha, Mr. President. It is the online knowledge base that will conquer the world... And I can walk!”

Maybe the good doctor can walk but, after a brief shakedown of Wolfram Alpha, I was not impressed. It made calaculations, but seemed to know very little, and, on a number of questions it refered me to Wikipedia. I may be biased, but my work does not include too many numbers calculations and Wolfram will not, as yet, pull me away from Google. Click here for a more professional report. (Both Aeswiren and Faux Smoke sent links.)

The secret word is Glove

DOWD FUCKS UP

Just as I came round to thinking that Maureen Dowd was maybe okay after all, she goes and blows it by cutting, pasting, and generally ripping off some other writer’s work. Okay so Mo has more excuses than a pimp going to jail, but fuck, this is just plain sleazy, and I don’t want to hear how she’s under pressure. She’s paid more than enough in these suicidal times to do it right. I can only agree with John McQuaid on HuffPo. “Sunday's incident gives us an additional window on the slapdash way a MoDo column is assembled. Dowd could be using the vast resources and reach of the Times and her substantial writer's gifts to produce a great column. That's the whole idea, right?” (Click here for his whole post.)

SPACE OPERA

THIS IS A STICK-UP!

Munz sent us this Sunday gem.

“WINSTON-SALEM, N.C. (AP) -- Authorities in North Carolina say a store owner and a patron thwarted a teen accused of trying to carry out a robbery by concealing a banana beneath his shirt to resemble a gun. Winston-Salem authorities say 17-year-old John Szwalla entered the Internet cafe Thursday and demanded money, saying he had a gun.
The owner, Bobby Ray Mabe, said he and a customer jumped Szwalla, holding him until deputies arrived. While they waited, Mabe says the teen ate the banana. Mabe says deputies took pictures of the peel. Forsyth County Sheriff's office spokesman Maj. Brad Stanley says deputies joked about charging Szwalla with destroying evidence. Szwalla faces a charge of attempted armed robbery. Jail officials say he doesn't have an attorney.”

The secret word is Mellow
The secret message is 5965732077652068617665206e6fe280a6

PROLETARIAT PINUP #11

“Puritanism, in whatever expression, is a poisonous germ. On the surface everything may look strong and vigorous; yet the poison works its way persistently, until the entire fabric is doomed. Prostitution, although hounded, imprisoned, and chained, is nevertheless the greatest triumph of Puritanism.” – Emma Goldman

DOC'S PAPERBACK CLASSIC'S # 56

Although actually a big fan of chaos – and also of disappearing into space – I could hardly resist this one. And, of course, the evil aliens (or whatever turns out to be responsible for the chaos) are once again targeting attractive human women. (And I notice the Earth is also upside down -- in the conventional sense.)

WHAT’S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?

Gil Kerlikowske, the new director of the White House Office of Drug Control Policy sat down with The Wall Street Journal for his first interview since his confirmation last week. It was published two days ago. Here’s an excerpt…

“The other part of breaking down the barrier is to completely and forever end the war analogy, the war on drugs. Since I used to stand in front of the helicopter for President Nixon who brought the term in vogue, it's fitting that I'm almost back in the same spot and trying to put an end to the war analogy. Regardless of how you try to explain to people it's a war on drugs, or a war on a product, people see a war as a war on them, a war on individuals and we're not at war with people in this country so I think we need to be more comprehensive. If we're not successful in improving on the addiction rate we have in this country and how we get people treated for drugs and return them back to the streets, it paints a very dark picture in the future, especially with the economy where it is.” (Click here for the whole thing.)

It all seemed like a breath of fresh air until the obvious question came up…

WSJ – Do you support legalization?
Kerlikowske – No. I've never advocated legalization and certainly the president has made it clear that's his position.

And, with that, it all went back to square one.

The secret word is Rebranding
The secret message is 53616d65206f6c6420736f6e672e20

Barbara Birdfeather – RIP

FLIPBOOK FETISH

Click here for one of the best flip books I’ve ever seen. (Supplied by our pal Wendy)

A BRIEF HISTORY OF RABBIT EARS Part 1

Gloria Steinem wearing the classic Hefner-Rotwang BE Mk1

VIRTUAL APOCALYPSE

Ever wonder what might happen if a massive online-world game like World of Warcraft came to an end? This what went down with a game called Tabula Rasa. The online world was shut down in on Feb 28, 2009 when, hit by the hideous economy, it failed to attract enough subscribers to survive, but at least it went out with a bang.

“So many players got wind of the impending badass finale that the servers slowed down under the load. You got trippy time distortions, teleportation, and direct communications from the actual Creator. Some players tried to predict what exactly would happen when the event began, and where it might be focused. Some seemed to want closure, frantically attempting to obtain the final pieces of certain equipment sets or to finish uncovering all areas of the world. By the afternoon, the West Coast server Hydra was the last server standing. As more and more of its citizenry logged on for the last hurrah, and foreign players from dead servers poured in to squeeze a few more hours out of the game, it became increasingly congested, buggy, and lag-ridden. The intended scenario was indeed playing out not just in the game and the fiction but as a metagame: the active duty population swelled as humanity prepared to make its final stand.” (Click here for more)

THE MIND BOBBLES

This has to be the most absurd toy to be marketed this century.

OUR WHACKY UNCLE BILL

A reality string becomes tangled aboard the alien space craft as it transits a brane, and Uncle Bill is less than happy with the result. The bubble helmet is too small. His leg hurts, and who the hell is the child wearing what are clearly a pair of original Rotwang rabbit ears?

SPACE OPERA