THE WARMTH OF THE VINYL

THE CHILL OF THE FLUNKEY

JUST PLAIN NEW YEAR GRATUITOUS

GRATUITOUS WAITING FOR THE END

I really don't buy this New York math that the b'ak'tun ran out at at 11.11am, and the party is at 8.00 pm UPSTAIRS AT THE CAROLINE OF BRUNSWICK, 39 Ditchling Road,  Brighton, East Sussex BN1 4SB, 01273 624 434

Click here for an Apocalypse of Yesteryear

The secret word is Tomorrow

AND TOMORROW I RULE!

SO IT’S GOTTA BE TRUE

Even at the end of the world you can count of the NY Post. Under the banner…

NYERS WHO BELIEVE IN MAYAN APOCALYPSE SEARCH FOR SEX BEFORE THE WORLD ENDS…they regale us of the following.

"All the horny hubbub has been caused by a doomsday prediction made by the ancient Mayan calendar, which predicts the world will end on Dec. 21, 2012, at 11:11 a.m.

While some people around the world are arming themselves and digging into bunkers, many New Yorkers are simply hoping for a hot time. “I will be looking for an end-of-the-world hook-up,” Dennis Cintron, 29, a Lower East Side bartender, told The Post. “If you’re going to go out, go out with a bang.” Click here for more.

Click here for Jerry Lee

That secret word is Climax

HOPING FOR SALVATION?

MARILYN SEZ…

“All good things come to an end, darling”

SPACE OPERA APOCALYPSE

AND IF YOU DON’T HAVE A BETTER IDEA...

LOSNG TIME ON HIGHWAY 5

Hanukkah has already past and the Solstice, Yule, Xmas, Kwanza, Festivus, Saturnalia, and all the other celebrations of the returning of the light bear down on us fast and – in this dismal, dubious, and maybe even dangerous year – we also have the Maya-inspired possibility that there won’t even be a 2013. (Triskaidekaphobes may be relieved.)  So on Friday we party (scroll down for details) and in the meantime I could hardly resist posting this weirdass tale from HCB.  

“Two young men whose duties cause them to travel National Route No. 5 on a regular basis between the communities of Catriló and Santa Rosa reported feeling "disoriented" during the trip on three separate occasions. After several minutes had elapsed, they noticed that they continued the trip without any further incident, but without any recollection of the distance they had already covered. This occurred to them on three separate instances and at different times, both noon and sunset, without any apparent explanation. Joel, one of the protagonists of the strange story, told CEUFO that they were chatting normally at one point and suddenly became disoriented, having no idea of what happened to them, but upon reacting, they realized they had covered several kilometers without any memory of doing so. The stretch of road where this alleged incident occurred is a segment of some 35 kilometers between the towns of Lonquimay and Anguil.

A similar incident befell a driver some ten years ago in the vicinity of Lonquimay. He stopped at a service station to ask "where he was" as he had no idea how he'd gotten there, although he had envisioned driving along that road. The driver continued his journey in the area in question, feeling disoriented once again. He reached the locality of Toay without knowing how he'd accomplished the trip. The event became widely known and a source of discussion among residents of Lonquimay and its environs, but was not picked up by the media. For this reason, the Centro de Estudios OVNI issued a communiqué aimed at "people driving along National Route No. 5, specifically the segment between the localities of Lonquimay and Anguil, and who may have sensed time anomalies, should please report it immediately to CEUFO, as we have received reports of three cases at different times and days within the past month."

Click here for Hank

The secret word is Membrane

POSTED WITHOUT COMMENT (except maybe a measure of disgust)

THE FROZDICK FAMILY

Moments later Stan and Dan Frozdick were crushed to death by the falling tree.

JIMMY SAVILLE WAS NOT ALONE

ONLY TWO DAYS LEFT!

If you think this is just our aberration click to check this US mail order operation.

YOU HAVE A PROBLEM?

SUNDAY BREAKFAST

I think I need a drink. A Cuba Libre? I played a show with The Deviants on Friday night, and, like the codger that I am, I rested up yesterday and it was only when I turned on my computer that I found the long breaking news feed on the deadly insanity in Connecticut. I wasn’t being fair but I was suddenly damn glad that I’d left America. It wasn’t so much the crime itself. Such things happen and they are both mind-wrenchingly tragic and close to inexplicable. What worries me more are the minor monsters who slither from the woodwork in the wake of this kind of horror. Check these two comments lifted at random and unedited from the Murdoch-owned New York Daily News online… 

"Finding out the REASON for these killings makes the deaths have meaninig. The REASON behind these shootings, which needs to be exposed is that PSYCH MEDS cause suicide, homicide and are being used to genocide the whole world. ALl the mass shooters were on them. The REAL CULPRITS are psychiatrists; these shooters are victims too. Remember Levi Aron? Who killed Leiby Kletzky - Levi's sister died on a psych hospital from suicide caused by the drugs. Levi was ON psych drugs and used them to kill Leiby. He did to the kid what was done to HIM by psychiatry. Same story everywhere. stThe columbine shooters were ON psych drugs AND taking a death ed class. In the 90s many schools had them and the suicide rates shot up duh. WHy? the social engineers who RUN mental health and education want to depopulate the pl

anet by 90% and mind control everyone thru drugs. Brave New world by Aldous Huxley was the blueprint for them - a fascist society where everyone is drugged for control. Huxley said "a scientific fascism will be easy to sell the masses" meaning, the "supposedly scientific" mental health system which is atheistic and FALSELY calls Christians and everyone with spiritual experiences and beliefs schizophrenic. The murderers are the drs who drug people. The drugs brainwash peple. Al the major assassins were brainwashed patsies - one of the reasons is to justify GUN Control laws to disarm the population so we cant protect ourselves from the government. It is ALL MANIPULATION. They WANT us to beg the government to protect us. Remember SON OF SAM David Berkowitz? He became a born again Christian 12 years ago and is nO LONGER CRAZY. He says he WAS crazy due to dabbling in the occult wjhich opened him to demonic possession .THat testimony is important and people need to hear it - that JESUS HEALS People of Mental and Physical illness. IF berkowitz had been killed, nobody would hear his testikmony. what use is that/ He sholuld be set FREE so MILLIONS can hear his story - THEN his victims at least won't have died in vain. See my website, free books and articles at 1prophetspeaks.com HOw to be healed, saved & born again. Jesus heals The mental health system is a front for nazi genocide QUOtes showing the real agendas behind mental health and education ILlluminati mind conttrol in psych drugs, music and education."

Or try this one…

"More to the point, the anti-gun laws failed repeatedly as they do with criminals who ignore them. The 'Gun Free School Zone" policy is not only a total failure, it's a magnet for mass-killers, might as well paint a bullseye on every school. See, when law abiding citizens see 'gun free zone', they know not to bring a firearm anywhere near it. But when criminals see a gun-free zone, they see it as a green light, a soft target of opportunity. No law would have stopped this psycho-geek who apparently was known to many in ewtown to be dangerous. One armed school official - teacher, janitor, principal - would have. But the liberal rats in the media and their big mouth big city ghoul mayors will laugh at that, preferring instead to disarm the citizens so that their gutter accomplices in the criminal world can more readily prey on them. Keeps the Elites in power."

Click herefor Leonard Cohen

The secret word is Unthinkable

MARILYN SEZ…

“I don’t want to think about it.”

ONLY FIVE DAYS TO THE END OF EVERYTHING

SO JOIN THE PARTY

OR WILL THE COMMIE ROBOT SAVE US?

GRATUITOUS CRUZ (PART 2)

JUST A REMINDER

Click here for Elvis

The secret word is Friday

Ravi Shankar – RIP 

BANG, WHIMPER, OR DRUNK?

How better to face the final curtain and defy the Mayan calendar than all together in the back room of a Brighton pub? But please note this is not a full flying Deviants rock & roll show. That’s this week. At this gathering we’ll have solos, duos and trios, guitars and drums, rants and chants and maybe experiments, cake and the odd exotic dancer. Human sacrifice is optional.

SPACE OPERA (Acme-style)

GRATUITOUS CRUZ

And click here if you haven’t seen the Ann Summers TV commercial

SUNDAY BREAKFAST

Our slimy, bungling, bought-and-paid-for old-Etonian Prime Minister has decided that the plebs are drinking too much – which seems hardly surprising in the foul and uncertain midst of the entire austerity movement of which he is a graspingly enthusiastic supporter. He means to put a stop to all this proletariat drunkenness by raising the price of booze. The BBC tells us…

“The government is proposing a minimum price of 40p per unit of alcohol in England and Wales in an effort to "turn the tide" against binge drinking.It believes this could transform the behaviour of those who cause the most problems for hospitals and police. It also plans to "end the notion that drinking is an unqualified right by piloting sobriety schemes for those people whose offending is linked to excessive alcohol consumption", says the strategy document." (Click here for the rest of the sorry story.)

Which essentially means the rich are fucking the poor yet again and they won’t even have the courtesy of getting us drunk first. Which in turn reminds me of the old Paddy Ryan song…

I am the man, the very fat man,
That waters the workers' beer
I am the man, the very fat man,
That waters the workers' beer
And what do I care if it makes them ill,
If it makes them terribly queer
I've a car, a yacht, and an aeroplane,
And I waters the workers' beer

Now when I waters the workers' beer,
I puts in strychnine
Some methylated spirits,
And a can of kerosene
Ah, but such a brew so terribly strong,
It would make them terribly queer
So I reaches my hand for the watering-can
And I waters the workers' beer

Now a drop of good beer is good for a man
When he's tired, thirsty and hot
And I sometimes have a drop myself,
From a very special pot
For a strong and healthy working class
Is the thing that I most fear
So I reaches my hand for the watering-can
And I waters the workers' beer

Now ladies fair, beyond compare,
Be you maiden or wife
Spare a thought for such a man
Who leads such a lonely life
For the water rates are frightfully high,
And the meths is terribly dear
And there ain't the profit there used to be
In watering the workers' beer

Click here for me

The secret word is Bottle

Huw Lloyd Langton – RIP

Sir Patrick Moore – RIP

MARILYN SEZ…

“It was really long but kind of floppy.”

BUT REMEMBER...

OUR WHACKY UNCLE BILL: Part 1 (Long time readers will remember this series)

“I’m back and I’m not happy.”

OUR WHACKY UNCLE BILL: Part 2

“I’m not your Uncle Bill. I just play him in the movies. And I never saw the mugwump before in my life.”

GRATUITOUS CORRECTION

15 DAYS TO THE MAYAN MELTDOWN (but the party is being planned!)

NO GUNS, PLEASE, WE’RE JAPANESE

I have always been morbidly fascinated by how the Japanese managed to conduct serious warfare while spurning the use of firearms for more than two centuries because they debased the nobility of combat. 

"Alone among countries that acquired and mastered guns, Japan effectively banned and repudiated these weapons, while simultaneously cutting itself off from the outside world. This meant that Japan was defenseless when U.S. Commodore Matthew Perry arrived with gunships in 1853, a culturally shocking moment, which vaulted Japan into a civil war caused, in part, by conflict between those who wanted Japan to continue to hold to its traditions -- and those who wanted to rapidly modernize Japan and catch up with the rest of the industrializing world:
"Warfare ensured that once states had acquired guns, they could not give them up. To this rule, there is one glaring exception: Japan. The Japanese first encountered firearms when Portuguese adventurers arrived in 1453 with two matchlocks, guns in which the powder was ignited with a match. Japanese blacksmiths quickly learned to produce such weapons in large quantities. The fifteenth and sixteenth centuries are known as the Age of the Country at War, when powerful lords bat­tled for control of the country. At the Battle of Nagashino in 1575, an army of 38,000 men, of whom 10,000 carried guns, defeated an army of sword-wielding samurai (or Japanese knights). Japan soon had more guns than any European country. Warfare and the proliferation of guns had serious social conse­quences, however. The battles showed that even a poorly trained peas­ant with a gun could kill a samurai, no matter how courageous, well trained, or expensively armored he might be. This threatened the posi­tion of the warrior class, who numbered half a million and were jealous of their status and their privileges, such as the right to carry swords. 

In the early seventeenth century, Tokugawa Ieyasu and his descen­dants defeated their rivals and established a military dictatorship. In the 1630s, they began restricting the manufacture and sale of firearms. Only in two towns could gunmakers practice their trade. Civilians were for­bidden to buy guns. Gradually, the government cut back its orders of fire­arms; by 1673, it was buying 53 large matchlocks or 334 small ones on alternate years. It also expelled all foreigners and forbade Japanese peo­ple from traveling abroad under penalty of death. For the next two cen­turies, no foreign power threatened Japan. The country was practically cut off from contact with the outside world and saw no reason to keep up with technological changes occurring elsewhere. Guns were forgotten until 1853, when American warships arrived in Tokyo Bay and, by firing their cannon, awoke Japan to the power of modern technology.” – Daniel R. Headrick: Technology: A World History (Oxford University Press)

The secret word is Loaded

Dave Brubeck – RIP

WRONG BLOCK – RIGHT RIOT

Were you looking for #9? Click here.

(Image supplied by HCB)

THE FROZDICK FAMILY

Velvet Frozdick could never be too careful.

MY ADVICE IS TO NOT LET THE BOYS IN…

Click here for Bob

PAY ATTENTION, CHAPS

SUNDAY BREAKFAST

"MMMM…Crunchy!!"

Click here for Spiders from Mars

The secret word is Shelob  

AUDREY EATS THE CHERRY

Click here, old fruit.

EVA EATS THE SUSHI

MARILYN SEZ…

“Can’t these women keep their mouths shut?”

JUST 19 SHOPPING DAYS TO OBLIVION

My relentless ego compels me to remind everyone how I was discussing The 2012 Solstice Doom Racket back when José Argüelles and Terence McKenna were the only major players. Now even the mainstream media are not only in on the act, but shrieking like Helen Lovejoy, “Will someone think of the children?” But don’t despair, whatever else might come to pass on December 21^st, The Deviants and their ill-gotten cronies will be hosting a party in a pub in Brighton so we can all cease to exist together. Details will be revealed as the plot thickens, but it should not be confused with band’s full-on, no-prisoners rock & roll on show in Lewes on December 14th. (See about three items down.)

“NASA scientists took time on Wednesday (Nov. 28) to soothe 2012 doomsday fears, warning against the dark side of Mayan apocalypse rumors — frightened children and suicidal teens who truly fear the world may come to an end Dec. 21. These fears are based on misinterpretations of the Mayan calendar. On the 21st, the date of the winter solstice, a calendar cycle called the 13th b'ak'tun comes to an end. Although Maya scholars agree that the ancient Maya would not have seen this day as apocalyptic, rumors have spread that a cosmic event may end life on Earth on that day. There is no true issue here," David Morrison, an astrobiologist at NASA Ames Research Center said "This is just a manufactured fantasy. “Unfortunately, Morrison said, the fantasy has real-life consequences. Morrison receives many emails and letters from worried citizens, particularly young people. Some say they can't eat, or are too worried to sleep, others say they're suicidal.”

96% OF THE UNIVERSE IS MISSING

And even if the great multidimensional, string-theory main switch is shut off, it still seems we only know about 4% of the known universe.

“Astronomers and physicists are now grappling with evidence that suggests, even with the most powerful telescopes, we can only observe four percent of the universe. The rest, they posit, is dark matter and dark energy: " 'Dark,' cosmologists call it, in what could go down in history as the ultimate semantic surrender. This is not 'dark' as in distant or invisible. This is not "dark" as in black holes or deep space. This is 'dark' as in unknown for now, and possibly forever: 23 percent something mysterious that they call dark matter, 73 percent some­thing even more mysterious that they call dark energy. Which leaves only 4 percent the stuff of us. As one theorist likes to say at public lectures, 'We're just a bit of pollution.' Get rid of us and of every­thing else we've ever thought of as the universe, and very little would change. 'We're completely irrelevant,' he adds, cheerfully.
"The 'ultimate Copernican revolu­tion,' as [astronomers] often call it, is taking place right now. It's happening in underground mines, where ultrasensitive detectors wait for the ping of a hypothetical particle that might already have arrived or might never come, and it's happening in ivory towers, where coffee-break conversations conjure multiverses out of espresso steam. It's happen­ing at the South Pole, where telescopes monitor the relic radiation from the Big Bang; in Stockholm, where Nobelists have already be­gun to receive recognition for their encounters with the dark side; on the laptops of postdocs around the world, as they observe the real­time self-annihilations of stars, billions of light-years distant, from the comfort of a living room couch. It's happening in healthy collabora­tions and, the universe being the intrinsically Darwinian place it is, in career-threatening competitions.
"The astronomers who have found themselves leading this revolu­tion didn't set out to do so. Like Galileo, they had no reason to expect that they would discover new phenomena. They weren't looking for dark matter. They weren't looking for dark energy. And when they found the evidence for dark matter and dark energy, they didn't be­lieve it. But as more and better evidence accumulated, they and their peers reached a consensus that the universe we thought we knew, for as long as civilization had been looking at the night sky, is only a shadow of what's out there.” – Richard Panek: The 4 Percent Universe: Dark Matter, Dark Energy and the Race to Discover the Rest of Reality ( Houghton Mifflin Harcourt)

Click here for Danse Society

GRATUITOUS ELLEN RIPLEY

Click here for trailer

WE’RE AT IT AGAIN!

AS GOOD AS IT GETS

All through the interminable preparation for this book I tried to avoid the inevitable contemplation of the hideous reality that this was my life. I was gathering together some of the best surviving stuff that I had ever written, goddamn it. This was my fucking life. This was it. Life. This was all there was. The blurb reads…

“The definitive collection of Mick Farren’s prose, over four hundred pages of some of the best writing the counterculture has ever produced, carefully selected and extensively annotated by Mick Farren himself, with superb line-art illustrations by Michael Robinson, a foreword by CHARLES SHAAR MURRAY, a preface by FELIX DENNIS, plus encounters with JOHNNY CASH, FRANK ZAPPA, CHUCK BERRY, GORE VIDAL and PETE TOWNSHEND, among others. Over four decades of Farren’s very best interviews and polemics.” 

Click here to get the signeddeluxe edition hardback»

Click here to buy the unsigned edition hardback»

Right now you can buy the deluxe paperback. The much cheaper paperback will be out in the spring.

Click here for Sid

The secret word is History

BUT LET'S NOT FORGET

This fine, fine, novelette is also still very much on sale – except Amazon seem to be having trouble grasping the reality of this. The publishers assure me that this will soon be fixed, which is crucial for buyers in the UK. In the mean time you can contact Penny Ante by clicking here.

GRATUITOUS BIG GULP