Monday, June 04, 2012

I BIT THE HANDLER (but I did not bite the Deity)














I have tried not to think too much about Pentecostal snake handling. I preferred to pass by on the other side, accepting that, like The Rapture, it was just another obscure biblical reference blown out of all proportion by folks who’ve been drinking corn squeezings out in the hills for far too long while simultaneously immersed in a diminishing Deliverance gene pool. It also seemed like one more unfortunate conformation of that theological view of the USA as the four century dumping grown for all the religious nut, obsessive and psychos from the Old World. When, however, our buddy Richard at Dangerous Minds tells us a snake has turned around and bitten the handler, I sit up and take notice.  

“Mack Wolford, a flamboyant Pentecostal pastor from West Virginia whose serpent-handling talents were profiled last November in The Washington Post Magazine, hoped the outdoor service he had planned for Sunday at an isolated state park would be a “homecoming like the old days,” full of folks speaking in tongues, handling snakes and having a “great time.” But it was not the sort of homecoming he foresaw.
Instead, Wolford, who turned 44 the previous day, was bitten by a rattlesnake he owned for years. He died late Sunday. Mark Randall “Mack” Wolford was known all over Appalachia as a daring man of conviction. He believed that the Bible mandates that Christians handle serpents to test their faith in God — and that, if they are bitten, they trust in God alone to heal them. He and other adherents cited Mark 16:17-18 as the reason for their practice: “And these signs will follow those who believe: in My name they will cast out demons; they will speak with new tongues; they will take up serpents; and if they drink anything deadly, it will by no means hurt them; they will lay their hands on the sick, and they will recover.”

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The secret word is Slither

18 comments:

jago said...

any news on the snake?

Diamond Jim said...

The snake may get its own TV show.

Natasha Yar-Routh said...

Yes, any news on the snake, does it have it's own agent yet. I hope it makes good use of it's 15 minutes of fame.

stu said...

just seen prometheus, excellent, i`ll not say anything other than the one lol moment is `well,it`s not actually your regular foetus`

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

Snakes are people, too.
~

jago said...

Yes I've even heard that people are people.

Mr Jones said...

Is lost JoHnny out there, still howling at the moon,
'cos I miss him?

Sure he can be cruel, he can be mystifying angry about this, that and anything but he's most definitely a presence here that adds something.

stu said...

mick gone off gigging.no joHnny?.nah!

True Severity said...

its an interesting thought Stu that the author has an alter ego called Johnny gave it some thought but on the grounds its not necessary and the comments are not witty enough and tend to vary from overly bitchy to positively fawning I think you are on the wrong track but i can see why you might have thought that!

Mick said...

It definitely ain't me, babe.

JoHnny ~ said...

Oi Tru' u pompous old fool..who dragged u in here..?? if ya got tooth ache, u don't see an 'AUTHOR' does on dahling..??
before ya tell me, I don't give a fuck wot u have to say..if I want shite outta u I'll squeeze ya fuchin' head, ya right I've used it before, it's a top line, waste not, want not..

sorry m8, truth hurts...hahaHa

Pepsi said...

Froggy, your charm must make you irresistible.

JoHnny ~ said...

excuse me that's Mr.Frog if u don't mind..have a small piece of cake for your cheek..I'm all heart,
please don't confuse generosity with weakness, it is Sunday after all..btw; want my trashed HawkWind tooons...hahaHa

jago said...

mate, you set out to outrage,but you can't get arrested.

RD

JoHnny ~ said...

outrage is for u old folks, I'm looking for something that's a little harder to find..HONESTY.

it's sadly lacking around here..

if ya wanna kiss arse that's fine, don't expect me to indulge ya, but wot do I know..I'm JoHnny the Chav..would it make ya feel better if I didn't talk outta turn..??

ya know wot they say, there's no fool like an old fool, never trust a 'hippie' now be a good chap, wipe ya feet when u leave...hahaHa

jago said...

oh i get it now, your just a sad bastard living your life through others, pretending to be aware, but really just another parasite.

Not too honest for yer is it?

ha Ha

jago said...

Sorry mate, your a pretty harmless sort of a bloke really, got carried away with meself there.

Who knew hey.

JoHnny ~ said...

..of course I'm harmless, if I was angry I would be dead..there's more FUN to be had, pissing ya off..proud to be 'tourne sa veste'..it means, to turn your jacket inside out, to go back on yourself..
.. so it's back to 'Mama Farren' m8...
btw; are u really a groupie or do ya enjoy the company of fools..??hahaHa