TAKE ME TO YOUR LEADER (Or maybe your designated ambassador?)

Whether or not the UN have a secret ambassador primed and ready to meet and greet any aliens who might show up is basically for you, dear reader, to decide. I’m also aware that some of you there firmly believe the aliens took over years ago – on Feb. 20, 1954, to be precise, when “President Dwight Eisenhower interrupted his vacation in Palm Springs to make a secret nocturnal trip to a nearby Edwards Air Force base to meet extraterrestrials” – and the ETs have been our shadowy overlords ever since. I would, on the other hand, point out that, if these aliens are our all-controlling shadowy overlords, they kinda suck at it.

“When the little green men show up on their space shuttle, they might have trouble finding a leader to talk to.Despite some of the most promising science fiction reports out there, the United Nations will not be appointing an ambassador to extraterrestrials. The Martian madness began with a report in the London Telegraph that "Mazlan Othman, a Malaysian astrophysicist, is set to be tasked with co-ordinating humanity's response if and when extraterrestrials make contact." Othman was appointed the director of the United Nations' Office for Outer Space Affairs in 1999. According to the Telegraph story, the scientist would announce her new role at a Royal Society conference in Buckinghamshire next week. The real life Men In Black story burned through the Internet, but the Guardian has stopped all the alien fun by actually asking Othman about her supposed appointment. Othman sent the paper an e-mail saying, "It sounds really cool but I have to deny it." She will be attending a conference next week, but she'll be talking about how the world deals with "near-Earth objects." Though, perhaps just like the alien ambassadors in the movie Men in Black, Othman could be keeping the job a secret.”

The secret initials are EBE