Wednesday, May 05, 2004

THE OLD ONES ARE THE BEST

As in the old CND recruiting poster parody...

JOIN THE ARMY
VISIT EXOTIC LANDS
MEET INTERESTING PEOPLE
AND KILL THEM

(Except now we can add...and if any are left alive, strip them naked, put plastic bags on their heads, and attach electrodes to their genitals -- and then put a saddle on their grandmother and ride her around the cell.)

Or there was Simon de Montfort, who had it all going on with slaughtering infidels and heretics in the 12th century, and who operated according to the maxim...Kill 'em all and let God sort it out.

And was it Barry Goldwater or the Marquis de Sade who claimed that...A measure of excess in the defense of freedom is never a bad thing?

THE HAPPIEST PLACE ON EARTH

The story circulates that the real reason Disney are attempting to bury Michael Moore's Fahrenheit 911 -- that demonstrates the links between GWB and the Saudi royals -- is that Jeb Bush has leaned on them, threatening Disney World's Florida tax breaks if the film sees the light of day before the election.

I also understand that Homeland Defense has a truly lunatic plan to start fucking with the Muslims in the Federal Corrections gulag. I wish them luck. My money is on the jailhouse Muslims.

But don't despair, (and talking of prisoners) Charlie Manson will be on today's Entertainment Tonight.

CRYPTIQUE -- Leave the bottle.

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