HERE THEY COME TO SAVE THE DAY!

We at Doc40 cannot reveal how the following email was intercepted but…

Dear Georgie,

Will you just stop fretting about not having enough troops to invade and subjugate the entire Middle East, plus North Korea, Venezuela, and Cuba? I know your feelings about reinstating the draft and having, as you so succinctly put it the last time you visited my bunker, “a few hundred thousand longhaired doped-up peacefreaks” yelling at you every time you step outside of the White House. You should have more faith, George. Did I ever let you down?
Although it has up to now been a top secret project, kept even from you (for the obvious reasons) I can finally reveal the first production models of the Lockheed Halliburton Robotrooper Mk 1 (pictured above) are now ready from active deployment and will finally remove the annoying inconvenience of the human factor from the modern battlefield. Obviously an initial order of five million units at a cost $2.75 million per unit is going to take what can only be described as major bite out of the national budget, but what other use is there for the American people except to pony up their taxes and keep their mouths shut? Also, with these babies on the march, we aren’t going to hear any more crap out of the Chinese about how much we owe them.
So, for fuck sake, cheer up, stop eyeing the Jack Daniels, and, above all stop complaining to La Rice at all hours of the day and night. In future, what happens in her dungeon stays in her dungeon. Did you think world conquest was going to be easy?

Your Uncle Cheney