NO MORE FROOT LOOPS

MrMR and a number of others alert us to how the Michael Phelps furor has now reached HuffPo as Kellogg’s dumps his endorsement deal because Phelps smokes dope. Lee Stranahan (like our pal Roldo) suggested that we all boycott Kellogg’s…

“Kellogg's is a major manufacturer of cereal and junk food products including but not limited to Frosted Flakes, Pop Tarts, Cheez-Its, Froot Loops, Keebler's Cookies, Rice Krispies, Eggo Frozen Waffles, Famous Amos Cookies and…has profited for decades on the food tastes of marijuana using Americans with the munchies. In fact, we believe that most people over the age of twelve would not eat Kellogg's products were they not wicked high."

And he adds…

“A quick Wikipedia search shows the founder of Kellogg's - John Harvey Kellogg - was a total frickin' weirdo who believe in putting children's genitals in a cage to keep them from playing with themselves and also believed in yogurt enemas.” (Click here to read the whole thing and a bunch more besides.)

The only problem is that our cocktail-party progressives seem to find this shit somehow stoner funny, and I don’t. Marijuana prohibition has been a lifelong slow-angry burn.

The secret word is GRRRR

NOBODY LOVES RUSH

Revered OG Aeswiren sent over this story from Alternet…

“An October 24, 2008, poll conducted by the Democratic research firm Greenberg-Quinlan-Rosner has Rush Limbaugh enjoying a public-approval rating of just 21 percent among likely voters, while 58 percent have "cold" feelings toward the right-wing radio-talk-show host. Limbaugh's cold rating was higher than that of all the political figures the firm polled. It was seven points higher than Rev. Jeremiah Wright and eight points higher than William Ayers.” Click here for the whole sorry tale.

And he tersely commented…

"Looks like most Americans have had it with Limbaugh and his ditto heads. The angry fat white men are not about to go quietly, however, and Limbaugh has succeeded in turning the Congressional GOP into groveling serfs. Keep licking Rush's boots, GOP Congresspeople! Turn yourselves into a tiny, hated minority party that the rest of us can safely ignore!"

LUX ON KNIF

The ever reliable 00Soul sent us a link…

"Lux Interior did a one-off radio DJ show under the Purple Knif pseudonym back in the '80s. Munster (Spanish label) put it on CD a few years back. This site has the entire thing as a podcast." All you gotta do is click here.

OUR WHACKY UNCLE BILL

Uncle Bill returns from his trip in the alien spacecraft, but somehow he is not quite the same.

LEGO THAT CHILD’S PERCEPTION

Munz sent us the Playmobil Security Checkpoint. And you gotta check it out. Click here and please scroll down to the comments because they are, as he puts it, hysterical.

The secret word is Barcode

And please watch the Ashley Judd protesting Klondike Barbie’s hideous wolf-killing program. Click here.

IF ONLY IT WAS THAT EASY

I once saw an Elvis Presley Guitar as a kid. A bunch of them were on display in a local toy store, and I was checking out the rayguns. (Is this Doc in Toyland?) The EPG was not much bigger than a ukulele, made from cream and chocolate plastic, and had four strings. This box called the Autochord was clamped over the fretboard, and would form C, F, G, A, and maybe D at the press of a button. The Elvis Presley Guitar was not cool – a total invention of the Colonel – and one would not want to be seen anywhere near one. Also four quid was a lot of money in 1956. Today one would probably sell on eBay for $1500.

GO AWAY, JOE

While concerted Republican attempts to undermine all efforts by the Obama administration to save the economy, and with it the country, might have seemed venal, poisonous, and even verging on treasonous, they took a turn for the totally and maliciously witless yesterday, when the Republican Party actually staged a media event at which Joe the Plumber was rolled out to explain his “economic plan.” This is nothing short of an insult to the intelligence of the majority of American people – the intelligence they clearly demonstrated last November 4th. Something the Republicans should contemplate as they strive to fuck things up.

A couple of day’s ago on The Daily Show, Jon Stewart referred to the Obama economic stimulus package as “revolution insurance.” It seemed extremely apt and something else the Republicans should contemplate as they strive to fuck things up.

The secret word is Wrench

"How are these ruthless, careless ghouls who murdered the economy still walking around (not to mention that sociopathic sadist Bernie Madoff?) — and not as perps? Bring on the shackles. Let the show trials begin." -- Maureen Dowd

Lux Interior -- RIP

PAPAL BULL

Our pal Aeswiren has a beef with the Pope...

"Days after welcoming back to the church a bishop who denies the Holocaust existed, Pope Benedict has sparked controversy again for promoting a controversial Austrian ultra-conservative cleric. Gerhard Maria Wagner claims the Harry Potter series spreads satanism and that Hurricane Katrina was punishment for New Orleans' lax morals. "It is surely not an accident that all five of New Orleans' abortion clinics, as well as nightclubs were destroyed," said Wagner, who has been made a bishop. "It's not just any old city, but the people's dream city with the best brothels and the most beautiful whores."Source: Guardian (UK)So the people dream of really good brothels and beautiful whores? Yeah, well now and then, maybe. At least the male half of the people. Then again just maybe, uptight catholic clerics condemned to official chastity for life, actually spend more of their time dreaming about the "best brothels and beautiful whores."Question: how long will humanity allow weird men with weird sex hangups run these old religions? Whether it's mad mullahs, insane imams or pederastic priests, the tone of this psychodrama is all very obvious."

Like Bob said – “limited in sex they dare to push fake morals, insult and stare” (Click here)

PROLETARIAT PINUP #6

“Take courage in the words of the immortal Che. ‘Whenever death may surprise us, let it be welcome if our battle cry has reached even one receptive ear and another hand reaches out to take up our arms.’”

STOP PRESS

My Buddy Holly story (actually from 1975) has now posted, just a tad late, on RBP/Yahoo. Click here and enjoy.

BUDDY HOLLY DAY

I was delighted to mark Buddy Holly Day with this grainy picture of the man on stage at the Gaumont in Wolverhampton, England and some anonymous reminiscing that went with it.

“I was at the Gaumont when Buddy Holly and the Crickets played there. It was in early 1958 and it was one concert which I really looked forward to since I had bought all of his early records, in fact That'll Be The Day was my very first record. I bought it from the Voltic for 6s 7d (33p). His performance was great."

"I sat upstairs in the circle for the Buddy Holly concert. I think the ticket cost something like five shillings (25p), maybe a little bit more. It was in February or March 1958 which could only have been a matter of weeks after he first made the charts."

"That performance by Buddy Holly at the Gaumont determined me and a couple of mates that we must start a group to recapture that sound. We did start a group but we never achieved anything like the Crickets. I even saw him in Birmingham as well."

I was told that an ancient retrospective on Buddy Holly that I wrote for NME back in punk rock 1977, when the two sevens clashed, would post on the Rock’s Back Pages, Yahoo blog, but so far it hasn’t appeared. If it doesn’t, maybe I’ll post the whole thing. Now click here if you know what’s good for you.

The secret words are Rave On

BUT DO WE NEED THIS?

HOW LONG, LORD? HOW LONG?

Happening across the faux-furor that the London News Of The World attempted to create by publishing a party snap of swim-meet golden boy Michael Phelps sucking on a bong, reminded me that, 42 years ago, it was the same News Of The World that ran the muck-racking expose of The Rolling Stones’ drug recreations that led to the notorious Redlands bust and jail sentences for Jagger and Richards that were quickly reversed when public opinion swung behind the two musicians. The absurdity/obscenity is really that so little has changed in all those years, while hundreds of thousands - if not millions - have been jailed or had their lives ruined by law enforcement. How long do we have to go on belaboring the painfully obvious? On July 24th, 1967 a group called SOMA ran a full page in The Times of London with the headline “the law against marijuana is immoral in principle and unworkable in practice.” A lifetime later, the totally absurd debate is still going on. It’s tired, it’s weary, it’s asinine. Barack Obama is cautiously ignoring the whole question. Okay, so he has a shit-load of problems on his plate, but the legalization and taxation of dope could be a massive, depression-easing source of revenue. It could also end the war in Afghanistan. (But that’s a thesis I’m still working on.) Click here for more.

DOC'S PAPERBACK CLASSIC'S # 54

THIS IS JUST SICK

DOWN FROM GOBBLER’S KNOB

My infected hand seems to have recovered enough to type a little in time for Groundhog Day, and to reflect upon how the rodent currently know as Punxsutawney Phil saw his own shadow, which supposedly indicates six more weeks of winter. Not good news for London which I hear is paralyzed by four inches of snow.

Oh yeah, I also have a post on Yahoo News about the music at the Obama Inauguration. Click here.

You’ll either get the joke or you won’t. The only clue is “I Got You Babe”.

A NIGHT THAT WILL LIVE IN IDIOCY

This story should have been posted two days ago because our pal Faux Smoke wanted to remind us all that it was the second anniversary of one of the greatest pieces of stupidity ever perpetrated by the Department of Homeland Security.

“On January 31, 2007, a bomb scare occurred when police officers mistakenly identified small electronic devices found throughout Boston and the surrounding cities of Cambridge and Somerville as improvised explosive devices. The devices turned out to be battery-powered LED placards with an image of a cartoon character called a "mooninite". The placards were part of a guerrilla marketing campaign for Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theaters, a film based on the animated TV series Aqua Teen Hunger Force (ATHF) on Cartoon Network's Adult Swim late-night programming block.” (Click for the whole story)

The secret word is Recovering

John Martyn -- RIP

OUR WHACKY UNCLE BILL

Still on the alien space craft, Uncle Bill keeps out of sight while the hairy robot monster gets the neon fix.

RUN FOR COLD CLIMATES!

I have managed to fuck up the third finger of my left hand. Currently the digit is a gothic sunset of magenta, purple, and black, and sufficiently swollen to make typing difficult. It seems to be recovering, however, and I hope all will be well tomorrow. Mercifully our pal Faux Smoke sent over this item…

“The Texas Department of Transportation isn't laughing at the ghoulish warning that appeared on an Austin traffic sign. Someone altered the digital sign to warn drivers to "run" from the "zombies ahead." "The end is near!!!!!!!!!" the sign exclaimed. "Caution! Zombies ahead!!!" "Run for cold climates," the sign instructed motorists. While some people found it funny, TxDOT says the signs are there to display traffic information. The department is now trying to figure out who hacked into its digital road sign system.”

The secret words are Brain Food.

BOOZE IN SPACE

Last night, my TV told me there were vast clouds of alcohol in deep space. I decided that I should Google this for information and confirmation and it turns out to be perfectly true, although there would seem to be a little confusion as to whether it’s ethyl alcohol (drinkable) or methyl alcohol (undrinkable).

“Astronomers based at Jodrell Bank Observatory have discovered a giant bridge of methyl alcohol, spanning approximately 288 billion miles, wrapped around a stellar nursery. The gas cloud could help our understanding of how the most massive stars in our galaxy are formed. The new observations were taken with the UK's MERLIN radio telescopes, which have recently been upgraded. The team studied an area called W3(OH), a region in our galaxy where stars are being formed by the gravitational collapse of a cloud of gas and dust.” Click for more.

The secret word is Cheers

PORKERS IN OFFICE

This creature is John Boehner. He is the oily and unnaturally tanned leader of the House Republicans and he and his slithy toaves have spent the first week of the Obama presidency bitching and moaning about the economic rescue package. Amid all the other carping, was a sneering sideswipe at a $50 million allocation to the National Endowments for the Arts (chump change compared to what been shoveled into the banks with no appreciable result.) “Ho, ho,” declared Boehner and a team of his snide henchpersons, “how many jobs is that going to create?” In fact, it could create a whole bunch of jobs. For artists. Back in the Great Depression, the WPA ensured the survival of a multitude of artists from Jackson Pollock to Woody Guthrie. A nation that denigrates art is a nation that’s lost it’s soul.

PROLETARIAT PINUP #5

“Remember the words of Karl Marx, my dear comrades. ‘Art is always and everywhere the secret confession, and at the same time the immortal movement of its time.’”

THIS MUST HAVE BEEN A VERY ODD MAGAZINE #3

It’s been a long day and fortunately I have another cover from the amazing Sir magazine to cover my ass, so to speak, because I am bone weary and totally not in the mood to write very much even though the bloody Republicans continue to piss me off. So please grok the fullness of Sir’s absurdity, and we’ll all reconvene later on the merry morrow. But wait. There is more…

THIS TIME WE NOT ONLY HAVE A COVER BUT AN INSIDE PAGE

And it turns out that one of the marijuana addicts mentioned on the Sir cover is none other than calypso singer Robert Mitchum. (See last Sunday) The Sir story dates back to the time when he was busted for ganga. If you're not familiar with the details, click here.

The secret word is Day-O

John Updike – RIP

THE FACE OF THE PORCINE OPPOSITION

Pillhead/clown/blowhard/addict Rush Limbaugh continues his stentorian grunting from a thousand radios, fervently wishing that President Obama will crash and burn in his attempts to become the savior of the nation, and denouncing any Republicans who might try to collaborate with Obama and his people in their efforts to save us from the abyss. Okay, so Rush may have a right to his opinions, but let’s not forget in that his current rhetoric of negativism and destruction is playing directly to the insane core of his audience base and is, above anything else, an attempt to consolidate his ratings in a news market that appears to be exiting the right-talk lunacy. My fervent hope is that Rush and his kind really are yesterday’s media trend, and will contribute to creating what – in the wake of the election, and in the context of Sarah Palin – I called “a rump fragment of the GOP – the Raving Looney Shotgun Hillbilly Jesus Plumber Party who would, if lucky, constitute some 15% of the electorate and never manage to be more than a noisy nuisance the rest of us could tune out.” But let’s not forget Rush is really protecting his bucks. His radio revenue. The money and the merchandize has always been more important than the politics.

And talking of money and Palin, Klondike Barbie is now shopping for a book deal. Seemingly she thinks her name on a dust jacket is worth $11 million, and, if any publishing house makes that deal while the book industry is in terrifying meltdown, it deserves to go instantly bankrupt.

The secret word is Piggy

SHEPARD FAIREY MAY NOT BE SUCH A HERO OF THE REVOLUTION

Valerie sent us this somewhat disturbing story by artist Mark Vallen. It starts…

“Most well known for his "Obey Giant" street posters, Shepard Fairey has carefully nurtured a reputation as a heroic guerilla street artist waging a one man campaign against the corporate powers-that-be. Infantile posturing aside, Fairey’s art is problematic for another, more troubling reason - that of plagiarism.”

Doc40 isn’t taking sides in all this. God knows we gleefully lift any image that isn’t nailed down, but we figured, since Fairey’s Obama images have made him so damned hot, the tale is worth an airing. Click here.

David "Fathead" Newman -- RIP

DOC'S PAPERBACK CLASSIC'S # 53

Lois was never the same after Superman dumped her.

BUT MAYBE THIS PANEL PROVIDES A MORE DETAILED EXPLANATION…

THE ADVENTURES OF MARILYN (Part 1999)

In which Marilyn realizes that the Molemen have infiltrated the party. She is not fooled by their ploy of disguising themselves in cheap wigs, striped suits and glasses. She is well aware that, while claiming neutrality, the Molemen rarely visit the surface with anything other than malign intent, and have too much in common with the C.H.U.D.s. To avoid an incident, however, Marilyn agrees to dance with one who claims his name is Truman, but who she recognizes as being, beneath the disguise, the notorious Cavern Master Sllubeelyx of the Great Fissure. Marilyn is tempted to complain about the vice-like grip Truman/Sllubeelyx places on her wrist, but again she opts to keep the peace. Then, while Marilyn is distracted, turning to smile at the French Homosexual, the Moleman makes his move. Will Marilyn turn back in time, before he bites off her hand?

(THE ADVENTURES OF MARILYN NOW HAS IT’S OWN PAGE SO THE WHOLE THING CAN BE READ WITHOUT SCROLLING. CLICK HERE)

NO MATTER HOW REVERED, SOME PEOPLE SHOULD PROBABLY NOT RECORD ALBUMS

And to possibly confirm the point (he said with great self-depreciation) here’s a recording from 1977 of The Deviants playing “Let’s Loot The Supermarket Again (Like We Did Last Summer)”. There is a video, but it’s too minimal to signify. Click here

The secret word is Eddie

A WMD OF OUR OWN?

Can I get it on Amazon?

A NEW DAY DAWNING?

By way of a postscript to yesterday’s post, President Obama, at a meeting of what the media call “lawmakers”, reportedly put the Republicans in their place with just two words. “I won.”

Munz also sent us an encouraging report from Entertainment Weekly that Obama not only carries an iPod but has it loaded with Dylan, Springsteen, the Grateful Dead and “A lot of Coltrane, a lot of Miles Davis, a lot of Charlie Parker.”

But less encouraging are reports are circulating that Obama may have bowed in some degree to Republican pressure, and that too much of the $800 billion stimulus package will be devoted to tax cuts – which do nothing for the growing army of unemployed – instead of the massive FDR-style public works programs that were promised.

The secret initials are BHO

THE RIGHT WON’T READ THE WRITING ON THE WALL

…BEFORE THEY EAT YOU.

With Obama only in power for 48 hours, the sorry resistance of the right was rallied by radio clown Rush Limbaugh who bluntly announced he devoutly desired the Obama administration to utterly fail. Meanwhile, on Capitol Hill, Republican Senators and Congresspersons scurried to media-cams, weeping, moaning, bleating, snarling, complaining, and generally behaving as though they weren’t a political party whose best ideas were the wit and wisdom of Joe the Plumber and Palin for president. As the country spirals down to random multiple doom, they seem bent on allowing disaster to happen if the remedy for disaster is anything but their remedy. And the Republican remedy is still wholly based on the corporate-friendly, free-market, greed-is-good, pander-to-the-rich ideology that tipped us into the whole mess in the first place. Having pissed away the farm, the moderate right condemn deficit spending as a moral atrocity, while the really crazy are right back to calling Obama a godless socialist, and predicting that we’ll be overrun by crazy-homicidal Islamo-fascist terrorists by next Tuesday. (These people have the most horrible Hobbesian nightmares.) I hate to be so retro as to suggest Bob Dylan lines exist for every philosophic occasion, but, in this case it’s too apt and easy and just impossible to ignore...

“Come senators, congressmen
Please heed the call
Don't stand in the doorway
Don't block up the hall
For he that gets hurt
Will be he who has stalled
There's a battle outside
And it is ragin'.
It'll soon shake your windows
And rattle your walls”

Do I need to be so back-in-the-day as to go on? (But click)

And while all this is simmering, revisionist academics like Andrew Roberts, writing in the London Daily Telegraph (and brought to our attention by our pal Valis) are already attempting to rehabilitate the image of George Bush.

“In the avalanche of abuse and ridicule that we are witnessing in the media assessments of President Bush's legacy, there are factors that need to be borne in mind if we are to come to a judgment that is not warped by the kind of partisan hysteria that has characterised this issue on both sides of the Atlantic. The first is that history, by looking at the key facts rather than being distracted by the loud ambient noise of the 24-hour news cycle, will probably hand down a far more positive judgment on Mr Bush's presidency than the immediate, knee-jerk loathing of the American and European elites.” (Click here if you want to read the rest of the dementia.)

The secret word is Infantile

PROLETARIAT PINUP #4

“Come in kitty, but don’t forget that Karl Marx teaches how the human being is in the most literal sense a political animal, not merely a gregarious animal, but an animal which can individuate itself only in the midst of society.”

THIS BLOG IS STILL PROTECTED BY...

IS THIS THE MANSON FAMILY LIVE?

This video had been floating around in cyberspace along with the claim that it’s real live footage of the Manson Family breaking into and creepy-crawling a private home somewhere in Los Angeles. It does raise a bunch of questions including whether this kind of filming was technically possible back in 1969. Some people who’ve seen it swear it’s footage from an aborted movie, while others assert that it’s a total hoax. I found it on the weblog of Adam Gorightly (that also exhibits a excellent obsession with go-go dancers) and, still having a morbid fascination with all things Charlie, I present it for your consideration. Click here and make of it what you will.

The secret word is Rise

OUR WHACKY UNCLE BILL

Uncle Bill, still on the alien spacecraft, attempts to phone home.

WHO KNEW EVEL KNIEVEL HAD A LINE OF PHALLIC POPSICLES?

Are we getting a bit too retro round here? I’ll attempt to fix that tomorrow.

I HAVE NO PROBLEM WITH DISTORTED REALITY BUT THE IDEA OF LIVING ON A “GIANT COSMIC HOLOGRAM” IS A STRETCH

The divine Valerie sent us the following extraordinary report…
“For many months, the GEO600 team-members had been scratching their heads over inexplicable noise that is plaguing their giant detector. Then, out of the blue, a researcher approached them with an explanation. In fact, he had even predicted the noise before he knew they were detecting it. According to Craig Hogan, a physicist at the Fermilab particle physics lab in Batavia, Illinois, GEO600 has stumbled upon the fundamental limit of space-time - the point where space-time stops behaving like the smooth continuum Einstein described and instead dissolves into "grains", just as a newspaper photograph dissolves into dots as you zoom in. "It looks like GEO600 is being buffeted by the microscopic quantum convulsions of space-time," says Hogan.
If this doesn't blow your socks off, then Hogan, who has just been appointed director of Fermilab's Center for Particle Astrophysics, has an even bigger shock in store: "If the GEO600 result is what I suspect it is, then we are all living in a giant cosmic hologram.”
Click here for the full story.

The secret word is Quantum

Danny Dill – RIP

GIT YER DOWNLOADS

Back in the early nineties, I recorded Gringo Madness with Henry Beck and John Collins, and we all had a splendid minimalist time going by the name of Tijuana Bible. Now I discover it’s a free download. Click here.

HERE WE GO -- MAKE IT SO, BRO!

The secret word is Inspire

TALKIN’ ‘BOUT MY C-C-CORPORATION

The original recording of “My Generation” by The Who is now a Pepsi commercial and getting heavy rotation in Inauguration news coverage. Doesn’t Pete have enough money? I am less than happy about this, both the selling of my memories and it’s symbolic role as an omen or portent.

GRAND OPENING

THE ADVENTURES OF MARILYN NOW HAS IT’S OWN PAGE SO THE WHOLE THING CAN BE READ WITHOUT SCROLLING. CLICK HERE, BUT DON’T WORRY, NEW EPISODES WILL CONTINUE TO POST FIRST ON DOC40.