SATURDAY ODDS AND ENDS
Saturday afternoon. It’s hot. The TV beyond the wall just told me it was 108F in Chatsworth (where the porn comes from.) I should be answering emails. I should be writing. I should be reading someone’s novel, I should be reading someone else’s screenplay. I have work to do, but right now I’m not doing it. I suppose I should be commenting on polls that claim the 2008 Presidential Race will be between Hillary and Rudy Giuliani, and maybe warning how, if Georgie-Boy continues to look so bad as we approach the 2006 midterm elections, the Republicans must not be allowed to slide away from him.
But I’m not.
I’m playing with a North Korean Insult Generator (see below) and mightily procrastinating. Later, I don’t doubt, guilt – if nothing else – will motivate me back to the grind, but, in the meantime, I am enjoying the sweet lethargy of life, and posting some odds and ends that might amuse.

ANOTHER SPECIMEN OF DRUG WAR FOLLIES
(via munz)
http://www.nytimes.com/2005/08/27/opinion/27tierney.html?th&emc=th

SOMETHING POSTED FOR NO REASON EXCEPT IT CAUGHT MY IDLE IMAGINATION
(From Japan Today) KOBE — Kenichi Shinoda, the Yamaguchi-gumi's No. 2 man, formally became the sixth boss of Japan's largest crime syndicate in a ceremony held Saturday at its headquarters in Kobe. The ceremony, marking the first change of power for the Yamaguchi-gumi in 16 years, was attended by some 100 leaders and members of affiliated groups nationwide, police said.
The Yamaguchi-gumi traditionally holds such a ceremony to mark a change of power, which is intended to establish "quasi-blood relations" between the new boss and his subordinates, the police source said. According to the National Police Agency, the Yamaguchi-gumi had about 39,200 members and quasi-members last year, which accounted for 45% of all gang members throughout Japan.

AND NOW A MESSAGE FROM OUR BELOVED AND THRICE BLESSED LEADER
relayed by HCB...
http://www.nk-news.net/extras/insult_generator.php

CRYPTIQUE – The trick is not minding.

The secret word is Tomorrow

DOOMWATCH
As part of Doc40's untiring efforts to prove that it’s later than we think, and global warning is further advanced than most in power are willing to admit, we (like Rod Serling) submit the following for you consideration...

The world’s biggest bog is melting. The West Siberia peat bog is the size of France and Germany combined and it is turning from permafrost to a land o’ lakes, releasing billions of tonnes of methane into the atmosphere in the process. Botanist Sergei Kirpotin described it as an "ecological landslide that is probably irreversible and undoubtedly connected to climatic warming." Temperatures in western Siberia have increased on average by 3C in the past forty years, but the thawing of millions of square miles of frozen peat has "all taken place in the last three or four."

The secret word is Slush

TRIVIA
Q: Who said "fascism is a merging of corporations and government"?
A: Benito Mussolini who, in context, probably knew what he was talking about.

CONFLAGRATION
For those of you who have been asking, my novel Conflagration, the sequel to Kindling, has finally found itself a slot in the Tor Books schedule. It will be out in June of 2006.

HYPNOTIC SUGGESTION – (in an accent like Bela Lugosi with high creepy minor chords) You will buy a book this weekend. You will buy a book by Mick Farren this weekend. (more creepy minor chords)

OH YEAH, I ALMOST FORGOT...
New Mick's Media column out in LA CityBeat...
http://lacitybeat.com/article.php?id=2533&IssueNum=116

BOSS GOODMAN UPDATE
A little tardy in posting, but all is well. Su writes...
You probably already heard, but Boss has had his angiogram and his arteries are fine. They're letting him go home today.

And from Boss himself via Funtopia Rich
"Angiogram done no probs, arteries all fine, goin' home today...YAH HOOTIE!"

RE ANN COULTER (see yesterday)
The following was sent over by HCB...
One of my favorites, from Casablanca:
Major Strasser: Are you one of those people who cannot imagine the Germans in their beloved Paris?
Rick: It's not particularly my beloved Paris.
Heinz: Can you imagine us in London?
Rick: When you get there, ask me!
Captain Renault: Hmmh! Diplomatist!
Major Strasser: How about New York?
Rick: Well there are certain sections of New York, Major, that I wouldn't advise you to try to invade.

As for Robertson, seems to me that the Venezuelan angle is their relationship with Iran, more so than supplying Jamaica with low-cost oil and swapping oil for doctors with Cuba. Chavez is being very cute meantime and declaring that he wants to give poor people in America cheap oil and gas. I'd love to see that.
But the fun part is how Robertson has got himself jammed in the middle between Bush's religious right agendas and oil interests. The poor cousin in the religious right has always been the hillbilly pentacostal factor, which the Bush folks, and the slicker members of that establishment, I'm sure, are as eager to forget as Nashville was when they went looking for slick country and tried to bury Hony Tonk, back when. But musically, Hillbilly is now hip, whereas it's be a cold night for alligators before Fallwell shares a snake with Oral Roberts, or Robertson teams up for a tandem limousine hooker humjob with Swaggert.
Did you catch the Texas chupacabra, by the way? Ratty looking thing, but the scary part is the fangs.

AND CHECK THIS OUT...
The site linked below has the preposterous idea that we should all make use of Paypal to buy Christopher Hitchens a drink. "Fuck off" I cry. Hitchens is grossly overpaid by Vanity Fair for his drunken revisionism. On the other hand, I wouldn’t mind the odd bottle of scotch donated by an awed reader. Of course, I’m too tech-inept to instal the Paypal button, but it’s worth thinking about.
http://windsofchange.net/archives/005182.php

(The email here, by the way, is byron4d@msn.com)

The secret word is Malt

COMPARATIVE RELIGION
So the founder of the Christian Coalition and constant political player Pat Robertson called for the assassination of Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez, declaring, "it's a whole lot cheaper than starting a war. And I don't think any oil shipments will stop." Since I don’t watch The 700 Hundred Club (few do) except when very drunk, I don’t know Robertson’s precise beef with Chavez, but I would surmise that it has something to do with Venezuela having a mess of oil, Chavez being a socialist, having his picture taken with Fidel, and giving the finger to the US oil barons. Any of the above would be enough to set off the loathsome Robertson. I don’t doubt Old Pat will get away with this statement unscathed, but I have to reflect that, if I was to call for the assassination of any political leaders I didn’t like, even on this humble weblog, I’d have the FBI ripping through my harddrive and god only knows what else.

AND TALKING OF LOATHSOME
In one of her recent, narrowly syndicated columns, Ann Coulter includes the most extraordinary aside. In a tired retread of basic Bush, she weakly rants...the savages have declared war, and it's far preferable to fight them in the streets of Baghdad than in the streets of New York...but then goes on to add... (where the residents would immediately surrender). Say what? Have you forgotten, my dear, that New York is the only place in this wretched country to actually go through the fire? I’d advise staying off 2nd Avenue for the next few weeks. Paulie and Sal want to talk to you, and they don’t look happy.

MO’ RELIGION
I know that this is very far from new, but since it’s making he rounds, I though I’d post it.
Taoism: shit happens.
Confucianism: Confucius says, shit happens.
Buddhism: if shit happens, it isn't really shit.
Zen: what is the sound of shit happening?
Hinduism: this shit happened before.
Islam: if shit happens, it is the will of Allah.
Protestantism: let shit happen to someone else.
Native American: what is the medicine of shit?
Catholicism: if shit happens, you deserve it.
Judaism: why does this shit always happen to us?
Pantheism: it's all the same shit.
Atheism: I don't believe this shit.
Agnosticism: what is this shit?

The secret word is Fatwah

CRYPTIQUE – There are no injections against the devil.

SUNDAY FUNNIES
Woke up this morning, and, for want of anything better to do, I read the NY Times (oh boy). Gleaned some hope from an excellent piece by Frank Rich that seemed to confirm my hope/feeling that maybe the nation has reached a tipping point on the nonsensical bloody war.
http://www.nytimes.com/2005/08/21/opinion/21rich.html?th=&adxnnl=1&emc=th&adxnnlx=1124669278-pcViXMxZuNBkIUkaXlDjWQ
I also picked up the snippet of information that "if the American military presence in the region lasts another five years, the total outlay for the war could stretch to more than $1.3 trillion, or $11,300 for every household in the United States."

But then I turned to a story about all the fucking money that’s being poured into "the debate between evolution and intelligent design" that is no fucking debate at all and the fucking NY Times ought to know better, and all the weight of depression came back as I remembered the millions out there who adamantly believe that God created the world in six days and that The Dukes Of Hazzard is entertainment for humans.

And then an email came from some girl with a link she’d recieved from 00Soul and I had to laugh.
http://supermodelpersonals.blogspot.com/

It was only at this point that I turned to the LA Times and discovered Hunter's farewell.
http://www.latimes.com/news/nationworld/nation/la-na-thompson21aug21,0,5289216.story?track=tothtml

CRYPTIQUE – How long can I share a planet with Jessica Simpson?

The secret word is Acute