DOC'S SATURDAY FUNHOUSE

Now this is what I really call a flying saucer.

Donated by peromyscus

I can’t attempt to describe this animation that came in from Wendy, but YOU REALLY HAVE TO WATCH IT! And when you’ve finished that move on to the weirdest soy sauce commercial ever known to man. (See left.)

Here’s a nice atlas of the universe from aeswiren. Try zooming out for as far as you can go.

And for those of you who are old enough to know better but stoned enough to care, here’s a promo for the Furry Freak Brothers animated movie. (That we’ve only been waiting for since 1972.)

The secret word is Weekend

DOC'S PAPERBACK CLASSIC'S #12

Cheap 'n' cheesy s&m except that this novel is the work of Edward D. Wood Jr – that’s right, that Ed Wood, the angora loving director of Glen or Glenda, Plan 9 From Outer Space, and Bride of the Monster. The truth is that Wood churned out paperback-pulp sleaze fiction to subsidize his adventures in movie making, and his output was prodigious. (I suppose there are worse fates. Johnny Depp did play him in the movie.) -- contributed by peromyscus

MEANWHILE, AT THE MINISTRY OF TRUTH...

Last week the Pentagon announced that soldiers serving in Iraq and Afghanistan would no longer be able to use military computers to access You Tube, My Space and eleven other popular websites. Much of the cable news chatter jumped on this as the Pentagon cutting off our boys and girls from stateside cyber-goodies so all their attention could be focused on doing the impossible and letting Bush’s surge succeed. (As if it has a any hope in the hell that Iraq has become.) It would seem however that quite the reverse is true. The brass are more concerned about what grunts might be uploading from their cameras and cell phones, and the order is in line with the new Iraqi government policy banning photographers and camera operators from filming bombing scenes, meaning video taken by citizens and uploaded to YouTube is now the only imagery the world sees of the devastation.

For background see Huffpo

The secret words are Night & Fog

OH SHIT! HERE'S THE REAL BAD NEWS

I'm just just gutted. First my buddy Boss Goodman and now his good friend Bo. All I can do is put it down the way it came off the computer. (But hey, Boss is recovering, okay? So...)
DES MOINES, Iowa (from HCB) : Bo Diddley is in intensive care after suffering a stroke in Iowa, a publicist said Wednesday. The 78-year-old singer-songwriter-guitarist and Rock and Roll Hall of Famer was listed in guarded condition at Creighton University Medical Center in Omaha, Nebraska, said Susan Clary, a publicist for the musician's management team. Diddley, who has a history of hypertension and diabetes, was hospitalized Sunday following a concert in Council Bluffs in which he acted disoriented, she said. Tests indicated that the stroke affected the left side of his brain, impairing his speech and speech recognition, Clary said. Clary said she has no other details on Diddley's condition or how long he would be in intensive care.

Here's Bo live!

STATUTARY BOB DYLAN LINE FOR JERRY FALWELL

“And I’ll stand over your grave ‘til I’m sure that you’re dead.”

Meanwhile, in this week’s LA CityBeat, I reflect on how another year and a half of election may ultimately destroy our brains.

JUST IN CASE ANYONE HAD FORGOTTEN

Watching American Idol and Fox News can do weird shit to one's memory.

"Of course the people don't want war. But after all, it's the leaders of the country who determine the policy, and it's always a simple matter to drag the people along whether it's a democracy, a fascist dictatorship, or a parliament, or a communist dictatorship. Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked, and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism, and exposing the country to greater danger." -- Herman Goering at the Nuremberg trials.

What kinda worries me is that the best thing that could happen for the Bush Administration right now is some kind of high-drama, major-damage, terrorist event right here in the USA. It would provide the perfect distraction, the means to close up shop on the opposition, and a solid get-out-of-jail-free card. What worries me even more is that if I’ve though of it, you know Karl fucking Rove has thought of it too. Stay watchful, my droogs. The rats are becoming increasingly cornered.

The secret word is Indictment

IT'S THAT MICK AND ANDY MUSIC

If you click on to the My Space page that our longtime friend and comrade Rich Deakin has put up for his forthcoming book Keep It Together, the sordid history of The Deviants and The Pink Fairies, (to be published by Headpress later in the summer) you will also hear a brand new Farren/Colquhoun musical piece “Ladbroke Groove” – essentially my introduction to the book set to music by Andy.

Andy while we’re on the subject of music, Andy and I have one real bad itch to do some playing around here in LA, so if there are any bookers or barkeeps reading this who’d like us on their stage one evening, shoot us an email. ( byron4d@msn.com )

THE BURNING

I have a bunch of writing to do over the next few days, but Doc40 will keep rolling with all stuff sent in by our friends. (Providing blogger doesn’t go down again as it did last night.) Yesterday aeswiren contributed this story from the London Independent by Daniel Howden designed to remind us that the destruction of the rainforest – especially the Amazon – is still the primary cause of potential climatic disaster.

In the next 24 hours, deforestation will release as much CO2 into the atmosphere as 8 million people flying from London to New York. Stopping the loggers is the fastest and cheapest solution to climate change. So why are global leaders turning a blind eye to this crisis? The accelerating destruction of the rainforests that form a precious cooling band around the Earth's equator, is now being recognised as one of the main causes of climate change. Carbon emissions from deforestation far outstrip damage caused by planes and automobiles and factories. The rampant slashing and burning of tropical forests is second only to the energy sector as a source of greenhouses gases according to report published today by the Oxford-based Global Canopy Programme, an alliance of leading rainforest scientists. Figures from the GCP, summarising the latest findings from the United Nations, and building on estimates contained in the Stern Report, show deforestation accounts for up to 25 per cent of global emissions of heat-trapping gases, while transport and industry account for 14 per cent each; and aviation makes up only 3 per cent of the total."Tropical forests are the elephant in the living room of climate change," said Andrew Mitchell, the head of the GCP.Scientists say one days' deforestation is equivalent to the carbon footprint of eight million people flying to New York. Reducing those catastrophic emissions can be achieved most quickly and most cheaply by halting the destruction in Brazil, Indonesia, the Congo and elsewhere. No new technology is needed, says the GCP, just the political will and a system of enforcement and incentives that makes the trees worth more to governments and individuals standing than felled. "The focus on technological fixes for the emissions of rich nations while giving no incentive to poorer nations to stop burning the standing forest means we are putting the cart before the horse," said Mr Mitchell.Most people think of forests only in terms of the CO2 they absorb. The rainforests of the Amazon, the Congo basin and Indonesia are thought of as the lungs of the planet. But the destruction of those forests will in the next four years alone, in the words of Sir Nicholas Stern, pump more CO2 into the atmosphere than every flight in the history of aviation to at least 2025.Indonesia became the third-largest emitter of greenhouse gases in the world last week. Following close behind is Brazil. Neither nation has heavy industry on a comparable scale with the EU, India or Russia and yet they comfortably outstrip all other countries, except the United States and China. What both countries do have in common is tropical forest that is being cut and burned with staggering swiftness. Smoke stacks visible from space climb into the sky above both countries, while satellite images capture similar destruction from the Congo basin, across the Democratic Republic of Congo, the Central African Republic and the Republic of Congo. According to the latest audited figures from 2003, two billion tons of CO2 enters the atmosphere every year from deforestation. That destruction amounts to 50 million acres - or an area the size of England, Wales and Scotland felled annually. The remaining standing forest is calculated to contain 1,000 billion tons of carbon, or double what is already in the atmosphere. As the GCP's report concludes: "If we lose forests, we lose the fight against climate change."Standing forest was not included in the original Kyoto protocols and stands outside the carbon markets that the report from the International Panel on Climate Change (IPCC) pointed to this month as the best hope for halting catastrophic warming.The landmark Stern Report last year, and the influential McKinsey Report in January agreed that forests offer the "single largest opportunity for cost-effective and immediate reductions of carbon emissions".International demand has driven intensive agriculture, logging and ranching that has proved an inexorable force for deforestation; conservation has been no match for commerce. The leading rainforest scientists are now calling for the immediate inclusion of standing forests in internationally regulated carbon markets that could provide cash incentives to halt this disastrous process. Forestry experts and policy makers have been meeting in Bonn, Germany, this week to try to put deforestation on top of the agenda for the UN climate summit in Bali, Indonesia, this year. Papua New Guinea, among the world's poorest nations, last year declared it would have no choice but to continue deforestation unless it was given financial incentives to do otherwise. Richer nations already recognise the value of uncultivated land. The EU offers €200 (£135) per hectare subsidies for "environmental services" to its farmers to leave their land unused. And yet there is no agreement on placing a value on the vastly more valuable land in developing countries. More than 50 per cent of the life on Earth is in tropical forests, which cover less than 7 per cent of the planet's surface.They generate the bulk of rainfall worldwide and act as a thermostat for the Earth. Forests are also home to 1.6 billion of the world's poorest people who rely on them for subsistence. However, forest experts say governments continue to pursue science fiction solutions to the coming climate catastrophe, preferring bio-fuel subsidies, carbon capture schemes and next-generation power stations. Putting a price on the carbon these vital forests contain is the only way to slow their destruction. Hylton Philipson, a trustee of Rainforest Concern, explained: "In a world where we are witnessing a mounting clash between food security, energy security and environmental security - while there's money to be made from food and energy and no income to be derived from the standing forest, it's obvious that the forest will take the hit."

The secret word is Chainsaw

But cheer up -- here's Bo Diddley (from MrMR)

DOC'S PAPERBACK CLASSIC'S #11

While the theme of robot love seems to be playing itself out, it might be noted that Captain Future is clearly not enamored of his metal buddy. On the other hand, though…

DOC'S PAPERBACK CLASSIC'S #10

…the drunk lady on her robot's shoulders would appear to be having a high old time. And while on the subject, here is a long story on robot interaction from The Montreal Gazette.

THIS BLOG IS STILL PROTECTED BY...

WE GET EMAILS

Kass writes (and allows me a day off) "As to robot/human love, thought you might enjoy this angle on it by one of my favorite poets, William Dickey"

ANDROIDS

Androids

are not different in appearance

from you and me

except they are more beautiful.

Male-type androids are muscular,

have smooth chests

and incredible apparatus;

the female-typeare, as we say, pneumatic,

and have been taught everything about it

there is to know.

You have been to bedwith an android, probably thinking

“Jesus, did I luck out!”

The androidis not really thinking about you at all.

It is gathering informationfor the data bank.

As you fall back,exhausted, unsuspicious,

the android will kiss your forehead.

It will murmur “Thank you.”

And then it will leave.

It is a characteristic of androids

not to stay on till morning.

And even if you were suspicious

it would do you little good.

The only way to identify the androidis to look inside its navel

where it is stampedwith its country of manufacture.

That is why it leaves while you are exhausted.

It is important to it

not to let you get that close.

The secret word is Lubricant